Evan Valentine, Stay-at-Home Dad

Like everything else in my life, this blog goes in very severe phases. During the times that I actually want to work on it, I develop a backlog of saved drafts to post on later dates where I may not be so motivated. The last several days have been a pretty good example of that. One of my many Useless Facts post, a little post about what I listen to on satellite radio, blah blah. These were pre-prepared.

We got this kid a music-themed activity table. It stands about 18" off the ground and has about 25 buttons you can push and get different responses. It has "speaking mode" and "music mode" which has no words. He only likes it if I put Cheerios in the pocket. Then it's his favorite.

Weekend was great. Concerts were great. Thanks again to Martha and Eric for holding us a table at Leon Redbone. We had good seats. Leon Redbone is a very odd man. Every time I see him in concert, there is more silence between songs, and more weird things like playing the same songs twice. He did two doubles in his set on Friday. Weird.

My son has just cried for two days straight. I don't know if he has more teeth coming in or what, but he is one pissed off kid. Here is a pretty common exchange:

he: [Reaches for coffee mug on coffee table]
me: "No no... that's hot" [I move it to the direct center of the coffee table]
he: "I hate you, Dad! I hate you and I hate this family, and I wish I was never born! This house is stupid and I hate these clothes and I'm gonna run away and never come back!"

Seems a bit of an overreaction. Then I take him up to his room where he cries while playing with all his toys. Like, he's opening and closing his "spin and learn" alphabet book over and over, and spinning the letters, all while crying at maximum capacity with tears running off his chin. I don't know if some teeth are about to come through, but I hope so. That would mean there is an end in sight. I'm really sick of this.

Stephen had his nine month checkup today. He has fallen to the tenth percentile in weight. Doctor said it's not a big deal and that it doesn't mean he's not getting enough to eat, but he also said "We'll have to keep an eye on his weight next time." Yeah, really? You mean you're going to weigh him next time? Wow. He got one shot and got blood drawn to test for Anemia. He was a champ for the shot, didn't even make a move. Then I had to take him down to the lab, still unclothed, to get blood drawn for a standard 9month Anemia test.

This is where things went south. We got our name called quickly, the nurse got Stephen's ticket and went back to the back area where the "boss man" was, and asked how they should proceed, etc. I could see and hear them through a little open area and they couldn't figure out how old he was for like three minutes. Then they had every nurse in there... "you hold his hand, I'll hold his head, we'll put this bar down over his legs.. ok, ready?"

So, they tied the tourniquet on his upper left arm and proceeded to stick him inside his left elbow about 20 times without finding the vein. Stephen never even moved or cried or looked like he felt it at all. Then they switched to the right arm. After about 20 more pricks (no exaggeration), they found a vein. Stephen felt this and was a little upset. Since they had all given up hope on this working, everyone had abandoned their stations, so Stephen's hand and foot were unrestrained (he was sitting in my lap this whole time, but there's only so much I can do). He began wiggling around and crying a little bit, and the guy was like "we lost it."

So THEN, with gauze taped to the inside of both of Stephen's elbows, they pricked his thumb and collected a whole vial of blood drop by drop. They let some drip on my pants.. ugh.. it was quite clear that I thought they were inept. They kept marveling at how good Stephen was being, and apologizing to me. Their (approximately one dozen) apologies were met with cold, silent stares, but other than that I was polite, patient, and understanding.

Things like this are the disadvantage of not going to a Pediatrician. We take Stephen to a general practitioner, because he is my doctor and I like him. I don't have a problem with the doctor at all, but when it comes to performing procedures on a tiny human body, some of the people are not very experienced. All in all, it was much worse for me than it was for Stephen. He cried for a total of three minutes, which is probably what would have happened if everything had gone as planned.

The reason they do not typically prick the thumbs of babies quickly became evident as the guy put three band aids on Stephen's thumb, all while Stephen was trying to stick his thumb in his mouth. The whole time I was checking out, we were battling over what Stephen put in his mouth. I would put the pacifier in; he would spit it out and stick his thumb in there. Then, back in the waiting room on my way out, I got Stephen dressed again. I kept his whole right arm inside the outfit so he couldn't suck his thumb. By the time I got home, I pulled his arm through the sleeve and took the band aids off. The bleeding had stopped. We managed to not ruin anything with blood stains (my pants are dark grey so they should be fine). He was extremely tired after his HIB shot, but now he's happy as a clam and standing next to the shelves where we keep his toys, destroying everything in sight.

Age: 9months
Height: 28.5"
Weight: 17lbs, 10oz
Head Circum: 17.5"

Related charts, graphs, etc.

Stephen had a few "firsts" yesterday. He took his first step (from holding onto the dog to holding onto his mom). Jaime doesn't think it was a step, but he was holding onto the dog, then he let go. He moved one of his feet forward (towards Jaime) and then planted it on the ground. Then he grabbed onto Jaime. I consider that a step. He also had his first (two) french fries.

I hate it when I come up with a new tag for this blog after the fact. A conversation I had with Krystle last night made me think I should have a "firsts" tag where I can track the approximate date of all all Stephen's firsts. First time sitting up, rolling over.. all that. So now I am searching through 330 posts to find firsts and re-tagging them retroactively. What a pain.

Edit: Okay, searching for things like first, roll, skills, and sitting, I was able to come up with a fair amount of "firsts." You can follow the the tag here. I was not able to find a real date on when he first sat up on his own, but it seems to be somewhere in the middle of the 4th month.

Okay, so maybe Stephen isn't allergic to pineapple. Maybe the timing was just a coincidence. It seems that what he had was hives that started on his trunk and spread to his appendages before disappearing. This is not uncommon in children ages 6-24 months, especially when recovering from a fever (which he was, at least for the second outbreak). He has been fine for almost a week now. Sleeping 10 consecutive hours a night, no sign of hives.

Stephen is getting faster every day. He is also becoming more of a terror every day. He is like "I can move, and I will move... constantly." He is even starting to attempt escaping from his high chair. He absolutely hates getting his diaper changed because he has to sit still for two whole minutes, and I don't let him roll over and crawl around. It takes three times as long as it should to snap his outfit back together because he is throwing a fit and kicking and screaming by then.

All other aspects of taking care of him have gotten much easier, though. I do not have to warm up the milk or juice that I give him--he can take it straight out of the fridge. This means it takes 30 seconds to prepare a bottle instead of 5 minutes. He can also hold his own bottle. I haven't fed him on my lap in a long time; I just put him in the playpen and hand him his bottle. If he is sleepy, he just falls asleep while drinking it. He is also more skilled at eating solid food, which makes it 3x faster. Also, I do not have to meticulously rock him to sleep. I can just wait until he's sleepy, take him upstairs and set him in his crib, and walk out of the room. When I go back to check on him five minutes later, he is generally asleep.

He can sit in a regular shopping cart now in the the standard backwards-facing toddler seat by the handle bar. Grocery shopping yesterday was a breeze... he never even dropped the pacifier out of his mouth until we got to the registers. He just looks around, fascinated with everything at the grocery store. After I cross something off the grocery list, I hand him the pad of paper and tell him to "double check it." He thinks he's actually helping. When we get to the baby food aisle, I let him pick out which food he wants. His arbitrary selections amuse me a lot more than him.

Now if only I could teach him to stop unplugging every lamp in the house. I'm slowly replacing all the outlet covers with these nifty ones that snap shut when you unplug something from the outlet. They have little spring-loaded covers that you slide to the side when you plug something in. I'm sure I will end up losing the original cover plates in the next few years, and everything will have these ugly kid-proof plates.

Last night was a horrible night. Stephen woke up at 10:00pm, 12:30am, 2:30am, and 5:30am. Every time was full-on crying, screaming, and complete neediness.

About a week ago, Jaime put baby oil on Stephen after a bath because recently his skin is so dry. I presume the cold, dry weather is the main culprit. The next night, he had a rash all over his stomach and back. We checked the baby oil and this is what it says on the back...

HYPOALLERGENIC
MILD
DERMATOLOGIST TESTED
ALLERGY TESTED
PEDIATRICIAN TESTED
If rash occurs discontinue use.

We did not give it much thought besides mocking the obvious contradictions on the label. We stopped using baby oil on his skin, and the rash went away. Last night we tried a new solid food at dinner time. We gave him Fruit Medley Dessert and talked about giving him dessert for dinner. This morning, after last night's debacle, we noticed a rash again. Around the same time he got his last rash, we tried another new food--Pears with Pineapple. My new theory is that the rash is caused by an allergy to pineapples. I think the allergy/rash is the reason he woke up so many times last night. If the rash clears up then we will try the baby oil again in a couple of days. It's so hard to figure out. It's also a little scary that the kid just breaks out in a bumpy rash like that. Allergies often have worse consequences that are unseen.

I hope I have it figured out. 2-3 hours of sleep just doesn't cut it, and I'm worried about the little guy.

Well, Tennis is back. The Australian Open is good because it ends an annual dry spell of tennis, but overall it's my least favorite of the major tournaments, mostly because the Australian fans are rubes. It's not rugby, just shut your pieholes already. Yesterday's controversy was not caused by native Australians, though.

One good thing about the Australian Open this year is that it marks the return of Justine Henin, my favorite player on either the men's or women's side. In May of 2008 (right before the French Open, her best tournament), Henin retired after 62 straight weeks at being ranked #1 in the world. No one has ever retired at #1 before. Since she left, there has been no clear-cut #1 player on the women's side (though Serena Williams might disagree with that statement). There have been five number ones in the past nineteen months, none for more than a few months at a time. Henin has already been called the best player of her generation, despite being 5'6" and under 130 pounds. The feeling is that she wants to win Wimbledon to solidify her legacy. She seems in excellent form thus far, like she never left.

Stephen seems a bit ill. His nose has been running a little for two days or so, and today when I got him up from his afternoon nap, his whole head was just radiating heat. I gave him some baby Tylenol and his temperature is currently 99.1°F and he seems to be feeling slightly better. He has been short on naps today, so I am hoping he takes a third nap soon... actually that may have just happened, though he keeps startling and waking himself up.

I have a breakfast smoothie that I have been perfecting. I have cut out the added sugar with my newest version. A banana, a strawberry/banana yogurt, milk, frozen strawberries, a few ice cubes, and a touch of vanilla extract (approximate nutrition information). It's quite a hearty meal and I can prepare and eat it in less than five minutes.

I have been in a bit of a slump with making/recording songs lately. I have started several songs in buzz, but they are going nowhere. It has actually been long enough that I am somewhat worried, though I have thought several times before that I was "finished," and it naturally worked its way back into my life. I just can't force it.. there is no point in doing it if it is not fun.

My toe is on the mend. With quickness. I'd still really like to know what happened. Having never broken a bone or sprained anything, this was easily the worst injury I've ever received. I guess I sprained/overextended/pulled a ligament in my big toe. Whatever connects to the top of your toes that allows you to pull them up was bruised and not functioning. I could curl my toe downward, but I could not lift it up. I'm actually surprised how quickly it's healing. After it happened, I skipped two of the next three dog walks, but I am back on the wagon now. My left leg is sore from walking awkwardly for two whole days.

Speaking of dogs, I came to the conclusion a long time ago that the bad aspects of owning a dog far outweigh the good aspects, especially when you do not have a yard for them to play in. Now that I have a baby, it's even worse. Add to their arsenal the fact that they wake the baby up from his nap every time a package is left at our door. They can not get past baby gates, so that is another reason to open the gates 85 times per day. Stephen really likes the dogs though. Chloe can not stand to be anywhere near him, but Davis tolerates countless unspeakable acts. Stephen grabs fistfulls of Davis' loose skin, bites his legs, and crawls right on top of him (the dog is only 25 pounds). Davis takes it all in stride. The staircases in this house are split... six steps, turn around, six more steps. Chloe likes to hang out on the landing between these sets of steps. Well, Stephen can now climb up the stairs. If he gets up to the second step (out of six), Chloe retreats. She really does not want anything to do with Stephen.

There was a good Kurt Warner vs. Joe Montana statistic on ESPN yesterday, but I can't find it anywhere on the web. It was a list of the top 5 quarterbacks for throwing touchdowns in the playoffs. Joe Montana was number one with 45 touchdowns in 24 games (I think). Kurt Warner was number five with 31 touchdowns in 13 games, meaning he would throw nearly 60 touchdowns in 24 games if he kept up the same pace. Others on the list were Dan Marino and Brett Favre (39 TD's). Kurt Warner had far fewer games than anyone else on the list. Beyond the numbers, there really is no comparison. Joe Montana won four Superbowls and is the only player to ever receive three Superbowl MVP's.

I used the rest of the chicken, pico de gallo and chopped pepper mix to make more fajitas last night--only this time, with chicken. I have been doing well at cooking meals this week because Stephen's nap times have changed. His second nap is from approximately 4:30-6:30 in the evening now, which allows me to walk the dogs and cook dinner right after Jaime gets home. Unfortunately, the new nap times are not working out because he is staying up too late. Last night we were up until 11 o'clock. Not cool. He woke up at 2:40am this morning and did not want to go back to sleep. I did not want to cut into the milk supply, so we hung out in the rocking chair against his will for a while. He didn't appreciate that, so I laid him back down in his crib and got dressed, preparing to stay up with him and feed him, but by the time I had gotten some clothes on, he was back asleep. He ended up sleeping until 7:15 this morning, when we woke him up. I would rather him get up in the mornings and have the proper amount of nap time than have my mornings free.

I have not posted any of Stephen's milestones because everything is happening so fast. Even since my parents left, he has learned to hold his own bottle (feed himself) which is really nice. He is converting into a little destruction machine that only likes to break things or put them into his mouth. He can crawl up to the couch and use it to stand himself up in a matter of seconds. Then he just pulls all blankets, sweaters, remote controls, and laptops onto the floor. When he has nothing else to destroy, he can turn around and anchor himself to the coffee table, where he proceeds to throw everything within arm's length onto the floor. He can even, with great effort, get himself into a standing position in his playpen, where the divider is almost as tall as him. At that point, he struggles on his tippy toes to get his eyes above the bar so he can look at you. This all takes a great deal of effort and he is very proud of himself by the end of it.

Stephen has moved into the falling down stage of his life. He just falls down all day. In a more general sense, he fails at nearly everything he tries to do, which causes him to whine or to cry for ten seconds at a time. It seems like this is going to last a good long while. Learning to walk involves a lot of falling.

He is eating a lot of solid food and Baby Mum Mum Crackers. The high chair is getting a lot of use. It seems he is drinking a little less milk all the time, though it is hard to tell. Sometimes I feel like I am forcing the solid food on him, but he is not really gaining weight, so I must be okay.

He slept through the night nearly every day for months, but now you just never know what he is going to do. He woke up three times last night, but just needed a pacifier in order to calm him down so he could go to sleep.

I have decided that today is going to be a good day. I got the kitchen faucet installed last night (no leaks). I couldn't find one of my adjustable wrenches, so I bought some slip-joint pliers at the grocery store, which turned out to do the trick for only four dollars. Tools included, a new faucet cost us about 45 dollars and 17 days of downtime (sorry Jaime). While trying to go to sleep, I had visions of my handywork coming undone and flooding our house all night.

This morning I made myself some coffee (something I very rarely do at home for some reason) and a grilled cheese sandwich for breakfast. Grilled cheese is one of my low-budget specialties. I use white american cheese and olive oil instead of butter. I just sat Stephen up in his high chair while I ate. I felt like I should have had a newspaper while I ate my breakfast, even though I haven't read a newspaper at any stage of my life. After that I fed Stephen a new food: turkey. So far we have only tried two Stage 1 foods. He liked the carrots but disliked the sweet peas. Today I busted out the pureed turkey with turkey broth. He more than disliked it; he hated it. He was a good sport and choked down 7-8 spoonfuls of it, though. Meanwhile his bib was covered in disgusting turkey product because he was involuntarily leaking it out of his mouth.

While all this was going on, Raffi was playing in the background. I fully endorse Raffi as a musician for children. He plays mostly traditional songs, always using real instruments (no fake keyboard sounds to save money). He also sings a handful of songs in French, which is early exposure to another language. I enjoyed children's music even before having a child. I owned Leadbelly sings for kids--Woody Guthrie and Pete Seeger too. It is good stuff and something I can play for my child without getting enraged. He responded positively to Raffi as early as seven weeks old! (May have all been in my head though).

Mr. Stephen slept 10.5 hours last night, so I can't expect the usual lengthy morning nap, but when that nap comes I'm going to check out the new webcast version of The Mike O'Meara Show. Starting yesterday, a webcast version of the show is available on their website. When the mighty WJFK flipped formats to become a sports talk station, Mike O'Meara had the rug pulled out from underneath him and his nationally syndicated show was canceled. He had been a staple radio personality in this area and many other major markets for decades. Anyhow, they are trying to get picked up by financing their own show with the addition of Oscar Santana. A better way to check it out may be to subscribe to their RSS Feed where you can actually download .mp3s of each day's show instead of streaming it off their site.

I run into this problem all the time because I do not install any programs that I deem unnecessary onto my PC. For me, virtually nothing is necessary. This means that I can not view .MOV files, for instance, because Quicktime tries to take over your computer and associate every file known to man with its bloated software. Extend that example to virtually every file type out there (I can't load Word documents, all kinds of stuff). To convert files to a type that I can actually view means I have to install software to convert them, which I do not do. Here is the solution: Zamzar.com. This site converts a seemingly endless number of file types to many other comparable forms. Movie files, audio files, documents, image formats, you name it. Here is a list of the supported file types. Pretty cool. Sure will help me out a lot.

EDIT: Once again, my prediction was dead wrong. After waking up at 6:30am, this child went to sleep at 8:30am. Maybe it was the tryptophan (hardy har).

We gave Stephen some pureed carrots last night in his high chair. Having a high chair makes it official--we have too much stuff for the baby. Now we need him to get a little bigger so we can retire his larger stroller. This is the start of a very messy boy. Soiled both a bib and a blanket in no time. He seemed to take to it eventually. Not sure if he liked the taste, but he liked the challenge of eating. We started by giving him such tiny amounts which would end up all over his chin. Then he would start opening his mouth for the spoon. I guess we're supposed to start doing this every night. Maybe it will be part of the routine; Jaime can feed him while I walk the dogs.

Looking through my .mp3s when Scott was here, I rediscovered some of my old favorites like Joseph Spence (1|2) and Tim Easton (1) and Townes Van Zandt (1|2)

We had such a good visit with my family this weekend; it seemed longer than 28 hours. It's rare that we get all five of us at the same place. I feel bad for Robert, he had all kinds of flights and riding in the car to deal with. Fly to my parents' and ride to and from my aunt/uncle's.

We got something in the mail that said Sirius/XM was going to reinstate our service for two weeks in an effort to bring us back. We were excited about it because it was going to be during the time of our big drive down to NC. Well, it turns out they gave us Sirius Lite (my name, not theirs) which has a limited number of channels. And it has NOTHING that we listened to. No 40's, 90's, Bluegrass, or Folk.. and it only had one of the 4 Comedy stations. You really need all four comedy stations if you plan to find anything remotely funny at any given time. Good job, Sirius/XM. Way to not win us back. We clearly didn't like it that much to begin with... they have gone as low as $4/month with a few offers ($24 for six months) and we still haven't signed back up. I know I am not an everyman in this regard, but I found that it didn't have much that I liked, even when we had all the stations. The "electronic music" stations in particular are dreadful.

I'm sad that this season of Curb Your Enthusiasm is over. It was promoted as the series finale, but we'll see about that. Larry David quits after every season, but ideas start trickling in and he makes another season 2 or 3 years later.

Okay, I'll stop rambling now. Lord, I was born a Ramblin' Man.

As of this previous Sunday, Stephen is six months old. That means the dreaded doctor's appointment and all the "necessary" shots were today. It was supposed to be five shots, but they had one shot that was a combination of three, so it was reduced to three shots and an oral vaccination.

Age: 6 months
Weight: 16lbs, 11.5oz
Height: 27"
Head Circum: 17"

Related charts, graphs, etc.

He is above the median height, but below the median weight. So far, not a fat baby at all--taller and lighter than the average (his dad was a fat baby). Also, the doctor said he is far ahead of the normal schedule for development. He didn't even ask me if Stephen was crawling yet (which he is). He asked a battery of questions pertaining to development, but it was all stuff Stephen could do two months ago. "Can he grab things? Can he sit up for a second if you put him that position? Can he roll over both directions?" He can sit up from lying down in a matter of seconds and stay there for 20 minutes.

The shots generally make him take a good, long nap, which he has hopefully just started. Now I am doing laundry and starting to pack for our trip. I may not be able to bring my guitar because of space constraints (we will have both dogs in the car for the first leg of the trip), which wouldn't make me happy. We shall see.

Today is my parents' 31year wedding anniversary. Congrats, guys.

EDIT: He woke up and resumed screaming at 11, just an hour after going down.

We went to meet my new nephew Finn on Wednesday. I forgot the memory card for my camera, so instead of posting a photo of him, I have to talk about it. (There's definitely photos of him on my sister-in-law's flickr).

I couln't believe how small he was. He was only 1oz less than Stephen's birth weight, so it was only five months ago when we had a baby that small. He's a cute newborn, and he looked a lot like Stephen as a newborn (although Stephen is turning from red hair to blond now). I was immediately reminded of how helpless a newborn is, even when compared to my five-month-old. It's actually nice now that I can pick Stephen up by his armpits without worrying about him being able to hold his head up. I can even hold him upside down by his legs or toss him into the air a little bit. Can't even come close to that with a newborn.

NPR is doing their "pledge week" and asking for money and talking about how great they are. Through their self-advertising, I found that WAMU FM88.5 has three HD channels, and HD2 is all Bluegrass and American Roots Music. Last time I was in the new car, I tried for a while to switch it over to HD2 or HD3 (more news-related with BBC nightly news and stuff). I can't figure it out and it's killing me!

This house is a wreck. We don't have many goals this weekend:

1. Clean up this house!
2. Feed Stephen some thick cereal on a spoon and record it on the camcorder
3. Buy and carve pumpkins with Martha and Eric

Sounds simple enough, but I'm sure it won't be. Supposed to rain on-and-off until late Sunday morning.