Evan Valentine, Stay-at-Home Dad

From the outside, everything looked great for The Monkees in 1967. In one year they had leaped from semi--or total--obscurity to overnight superstardom. They had a hit TV series, two #1 singles ("Last Train to Clarksville," and "I'm A Believer"), and two #1 albums ("The Monkees," and "More of The Monkees"). The only problem was the Monkees weren't allowed to play on their own records. Why not? Because Don Kirshner, the musical supervisor of The Monkees, said so. It was... well... embarassing. Here they were, pretending to be a real group, when in fact they had almost nothing to do with "their" music. Critics made fun of them. Even worse, teenyboppers idolized them for something they weren't doing. And to add insult to injury, Kirshner made more money from their records than they did. They each got a 1.5% royalty, but Kirshner go 15%! They had their pride, after all.

Trouble had been brewing for some time between Kirshner and the group, particularly Mike Nesmith, who wasn't even allowed to play guitar on the songs he wrote. That was Kirshner's studio policy, The Monkees just sang vocals while studio musicians played on the tracks. But what the hell, Kirshner reasoned, he was getting results--hits--and that was his job. So what if Nesmith had to stand by and watch Glen Campbell put the guitar licks on his own song, "Mary Mary"? This was the only way management could be sure it was right. The bottom line was what counted, after all. Nesmith, a genuinely creative individual, just stewed.

"Essentially, the big collision I had with Don Kirshner was this," said Nesmith; "he kept saying, 'You can't make the music; it would be no good, it won't be a hit.' And I was saying, 'Hey, the music isn't a hit because somebody wonderful is making it, the music is a hit because of the television show. So, at least let us put out music that is closer to our personas, closer to who we are artistically, so that we don't have to walk around and have people throwing eggs at us,' which they were."

Eventually the feud came to a showdown in early '67 at Kirshner's suite at the Beverly Hills Hotel. Kirshner had just handed the four Monkees some new demos (including "Sugar, Sugar," a bubblegum hit later for Kirshner's Archies) that they would be putting vocals on. Nesmith stepped forward and demanded that musical control be given to The Monkees. When Kirshner refused, Nesmith angrily smashed his fist through the wall, declaring, "That could have been your face!" Then The Monkees went off to record some original material without Kirshner's approval.

What happened next is a little unclear. While The Monkees were working out their own songs, Kirshner appears to have approached Davy Jones, one of the members of the group, and talking him into going into the studio without the rest of The Monkees. Jones put the vocals on several tunes, one of which was "A Little Bit Me, A Little Bit You." But The Monkees weren't doing the backing vocals. Who was it? Eric Lefcowitz, author of The Monkees Tale, speculates "Kirshner was quoted once as saying that Neil Diamond and Carole King had sung back-up vocals on some Monkees songs, and I think that if you listen closely to 'A Little Bit Me,' you can hear them. It sounds like Neil Diamond to me." And why would Jones record without the rest of the group? "I don't know, of course," Lefcowitz says, "but Davy Jones hadn't ever had the chance to sing lead before. This was his session. Maybe that had something to do with it."

Maybe, maybe not. The important thing is that in a power play, Kirshner recorded and released "A Little Bit Me, A Little Bit You" without even telling The Monkees he was doing it! That was the last straw. Monkees' producers Bob Rafelson and Bart Schneider wanted hits, but they weren't going to put up with that from anyone. They fired Kirshner, and yanked the single out of American record stores. Then they re-released it with a Monkees original--Nesmith's "The Girl I Knew Somewhere"--on the B side. Finally The Monkees could smile. They were out from under Kirshner... and a song they'd actually played on made the Top 40--"The Girl I Knew Somewhere" reached #39 on the charts.

I'm sorry folks, but I just can not get into the Winter Olympics. I should preface this [rant] by saying I grew up outside of Atlanta, so ice and snow are quite foreign to me. It was rare that I even met someone who had ever been skiing (water skiing doesn't count).

The Winter Games feature far too many competitions that are either a) boring, b) not sports or c) determined by judges.

Am I really supposed to believe that bobsledders are brilliant athletes because they lean into turns to shave 0.02 seconds off their time? It's like having a competition to see who can get down the playground slide the fastest. What's next? Log flume races? A roller coaster competition?

Then there's curling, another non-sport. Look, if you can excel at something while elderly or inebriated, it is not a sport (that goes for you too, Bowling). I understand that it is a game of millimeters and it requires precision and whatnot, but so does Billiards. Billiards has not made it to the summer games because the summer games are full of real sports and do not need all of this filler to draw fans.

Then there is the biathlon, which is the equivalent of the marathon race in the Summer Olympics, except with firearms(?). Involving firearms in an athletic competition is like NASCAR--the car/gun does all the work! I've heard the argument that race car drivers are athletes because they "have to train a lot" and "go on a special diet." You know who else has to go on a special diet? Supermodels! Marksmen can't even claim that. I'm sure there is at least one severely overweight, unathletic marksman in the world.

But, at least the above events are not decided by judges.

If you win something because you received the highest score(s) from a panel of judges, you do not deserve a medal; you deserve a blue ribbon. And up next on the winter games, the science fair qualifying event! I realize that the summer Olympics has its share of events determined by judges (diving, gymnastics), but the Winter Olympics seems to have a lot more of these events. Figure skating and gymnastics fall under the same category for me. It's a high-end dance competition determined by judges. I don't care what anyone says, judges are biased (and they can be paid off). If you have a difficult routine, and you don't make any mistakes, who is to judge who actually won the competition? Does it really come down to who pointed their toes? Up next here on NBC, it's Ice Dancing With the Stars--Olympic Edition! I'm Tom Bergeron; don't touch that dial.. I'm not disparaging the competitors in this case (because gymnasts, snowboarders, aerial skiers, and divers are all athletes, unlike curlers), but I don't think an Olympic competition should be decided by judges.

Why is it that snowboarding has made it into the Winter Olympics, but skateboarding has not made it into the Summer Games? Again, it is because the Summer Olympics does not need all of this filler to draw viewers/interest. They can afford to be "choosy" when it comes to allowing new sports. Don't get me wrong, I think Shaun White is nothing short of a badass. I think he would win no matter how the competition was set up.

If you run a 100m footrace, then you have a chance of breaking the world record, but if you ride down the super halfpipe on a snowboard while doing flips, you can only win for that day. There is no universal standard you can hold someone up to. You can't call Guinness after receiving a high score on a judged event, because you haven't really accomplished anything definite.

So here's what the Winter Olympics have that I'll watch: speed skating, hockey, and the different ski races. Pretty sad list.

Leon Redbone is a fringe performer with a dedicated following. I have seen him 8 or 9 times in concert.. if that's not dedication, I don't know what is. I have traveled to different states on more than one occasion to see him. I was literally the only one left to see his last 3 songs during a hurricane in Chattanooga at an outdoor concert. Leon Redbone strikes a chord with some people, and I am one of them. I am seeing him again next Friday, and I'm already excited.

Redbone's history begins at the beginning of his career because virtually nothing is known about his background or personal life. His real name, birthday, country of origin and ethnicity are all unknown, though people have speculated about these things for 35+ years now. He has claimed to have been born in Bombay during a monsoon to parents Niccolò Paganini (a composer and violinist who died in 1840) and Jenny Lind (a singer who died in 1887), which contributes to the mystique about his age. He has also listed his date of birth as October 29, 1929, the day of the stock market crash that sent America into the Great Depression. He often claims (erroneously, of course) that songs written well before his time were "stolen" from him. It hearkens back to the days before information was so readily available about celebrities' personal lives and upbringing. It appears he has worked very hard to create and maintain this mystique.

Leon Redbone has made a career out of arranging and performing songs that originated before my grandparents' time, though he attracts a wide and varied audience, ranging in ages and musical tastes. His style is hard to pin down as it is a mix of old-time blues, ragtime, jazz, country, and vaudeville. If it were necessary to sum up his style, one might say he does cleaned-up renditions of Tin Pan Alley classics from the 1920's and 30's. He has a very unique voice and is able to pull a lot of yodel-style octave jumps. He is also an excellent acoustic guitarist, which is often obscured by his interesting baritone vocal stylings. He is somehow able to emulate all the counterpoint of ragtime on a six-string acoustic guitar--a feat not attempted by many. Upon his arrival to the music scene, Leon Redbone was rumored to be an alter-ego of Bob Dylan, Andy Kaufman and even Frank Zappa.

He composed/performed the theme song to Mr. Belvedere (and apparently composed/performed the theme song to the sitcom version of Harry and the Hendersons, which I did not know existed). He voiced the character Leon the Snowman in the 2003 film Elf, where he was also featured heavily in the soundtrack and film score.

Seeing Leon Redbone live is akin to stepping in a time machine. His fedora hat, dark sunglasses and cane contribute to the mystery and timelessness of the act. The stage versions of his songs are stripped down to the bare essentials. For the past ten years or so, he most often performs with just a trumpet player and pianist. His act is peppered with banter and jokes that feel over a century old. He often shuffles through papers and proposes "a sing-along" to his instrumentalists; the suggestion is met with a sigh and eyerolls as Leon breaks into song (usually "I've Been Working on the Railroad" or "Twinkle Twinkle, Little Star"). At the end of nearly every show, he re-emerges on stage to take a picture of the audience. If I were to ever develop a stage presence, I often wonder which of Leon Redbone's stage gimmicks I would "borrow."

Here is a video of Leon performing Please Don't Talk About Me When I'm Gone, originally released in 1930:

Some of those guitar licks are extremely difficult. It is very laid-back and does not give that impression, but do not be fooled. This is the magic of Leon Redbone. It sucks that his left hand is obscured in this particular camera angle. Here are some more videos...

On Alf's talk show
I Ain't Got Nobody
Walking Stick
Harvest Moon (better version than the Alf one)
Leon Redbone can certainly whistle

This "lovers' holiday" is an anomaly. It was actually an effort by the Catholic Church to keep teenagers from becoming lovers.

Before Christ was born, it was a Roman tradition for teenage girls and boys to gather every February in the name of the god Lupercus, and randomly select a "mate" for a year. They were permitted to do anything they liked together (and what else would teenagers do?).

When Christians gained power in the Roman Empire, they wanted to bring this practice to an end. So they selected a substitute for Lupercus (to be the focus of a parallel holiday)--St. Valentine, a bishop that had reputedly been tortured and executed by Emporer Claudius II in 270 A.D., for performing marriages after Claudius had outlawed them in the Empire. This symbol of more "wholesome" love was reluctantly accepted by the Romans. But just to be sure no one gave in to temptation, the Catholic Church made it a mortal sin to worship Lupercus. Eventually, Valentine's Day became a recognized holiday throughout Western Europe.

If teens couldn't get together in February, what could they do? They could send each other respectful notes of affection. And they did, although it seems like a poor substitute. At any rate, sending lover's greetings became a part of the Valentine's day ritual, and when Christian influence grew, the practice of sending notes on February 14 spread with it.

The first greeting cards didn't appear until the 18th century. Printed cards were common in Germany by the 1780's; they were called Freundschaftkarten, or "friendship cards." The first American cards were manufactured in the 1870's, at an amazing cost of up to thirty-five dollars apiece.

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In the spirit of Valentine's Day (sort of), here are a few public marriage proposals gone wrong. Very, very wrong. I think maybe the theme is that these were all on Valentine's Day. Poor guys.

Two notable events that happened February 11, 1990.

First, Nelson Mandela was released from prison after 27 years. He was imprisoned longer than any of the other defendants who were charged in the Rivonia Trial in 1963-64.

On the other end of the spectrum, in what is now being called "the biggest upset in sports history," Mike Tyson was knocked out by Buster Douglas. The betting odds were officially 42:1 at the time of the fight.

More notable events from February 11.

I feel that I have been engrossed in WordPress long enough that I can put together a fairly authoritative list of WordPress plugins with an explanation of each. These are the plugins I use. I don't use twitter or facebook, so you won't find anything related to those two services in here. Presented in alphabetical order:

1. AddToAny. This plugin allows readers to add a more profession-looking link to your blog on their networking service of choice. It has automatic options for Twitter, Facebook, Myspace, Digg, StumbleUpon, virtually anything you can imagine.
2. Akismet. Akismet checks your comments against the Akismet web service to see if they look like spam or not, then it automatically files them under "spam" if there is a match. It allows you to manage/review the comments after they are marked as spam, and undelete comments if necessary. This plugin has already saved me from over 600 spam comments on this blog.
3. All-in-one SEO Pack. This plugin allows you to setup your metatags for your both your main page and individual posts. You can add comments, craft an excerpt, or add tags for Search Engine Optimization.
4. Apture. My favorite plugin. This allows you to contain your links within java pop-up windows on your site. Instead of people clicking your link to a Wikipedia article, they merely hover over the link and the article pops up within your page. This allows people to view material that is pertinent to your articles without navigating away from your page. It works automatically with YouTube, Wikipedia, Twitter, IMDB, Amazon, and many more.
5. Audio Player. A highly configurable plugin that turns your links to .mp3 files into a stylish Play button. It uses Flash animation and expands when clicked. It also keeps the clueless from stealing .mp3 files off your server and forces them to stream the files.
6. Better-Wiki-Link. This plugin automatically creates a link to a related Wikipedia article if you put double brackets around any text in your blog entry. When used in conjunction with Apture, it creates a hover-link that brings up the Wikipedia article in a pop-up java window.
7. Better Tag Cloud. A more configurable tag cloud than the default tag cloud provided with WordPress.
8. Blog Protector. This plugin attempts to prevent people from plagiarizing information from your blog. It disables the highlighting of text (and in turn disables copy-and-paste of text from your blog). It can also be set to a) disable the ability for people to drag your photos onto their desktop and/or b) disable the ability to right-click on your page. I currently do not have this plugin enabled because it causes conflict with some other features of my blog, but maybe after a few more developments of the plugin I will be able to enable it.
9. Broken Link Checker. This plugin continually checks all the links (past and present) on your blog entries and validates that no links are broken. I have over 600 links in my blog thus far, so this is a great plugin for me (this post alone has 29 links). Sometimes pages disappear and links in your old posts no longer work; this plugin keeps you from having to constantly re-check all of your links. It runs in the background and is not visible to readers of your blog.
10. CommentLuv. When people fill out their information to leave a comment on your blog, this plugin checks the URL they provide. If the URL points to another blog, the plugin will automatically add a link to their most recent blog post. This provides free advertisement to others' blogs and helps the blogging community as a whole.
11. Do Follow. Removes the nofollow attribute that WordPress adds to comments by default.
12. Feed Pauser. Allows authors to pause a feed from immediately being published. I frequently make a host of minor changes to a post immediately after it is published. This ensures that the post does not show up in my RSS feed until I have made all of my final adjustments (I have my Feed Pauser set to wait 20 minutes).
13. Flickr Widget. A widget which displays the most recent photos from a Flickr account (mine displays in the right sidebar). You only have to set it up once and it automatically shows the most recent photos for you as you update your Flickr.
14. GD Simple Widgets. This is a pack of several basic widgets. Most of them are improvements of widgets that come with WordPress by default, such as Recent Posts, Related Posts, Recent Comments.
15. Google XML Sitemaps. This plugin will generate a special XML sitemap which will help search engines like Google, Yahoo, Bing and Ask.com to better index your blog. It runs in the background and updates automatically every time you make a change to your blog.
16. Gravatar Signup Encouragement. Encourages commenters who do not already have a Gravatar to sign up for a free Gravatar.
17. No Curly Quotes. Stops WordPress from turning the ' and " characters into curly quotes in blog posts, titles, excerpts and comments. Options can be set for each element separately. Curly quotes cause problems when cutting&pasting text.
18. Outbound Links. Forces all outbund links to open in a new window. This helps ensure that people do not navigate away from your page when they click a link.
19. Sidebar Login. Adds a sidebar widget to let users login to your blog. I use it as the top widget in the right sidebar. (No one ever logs in, though).
20. Smart Ads. Allows you to automatically place Google Ads at certain places in your posts. You set certain rules (ie, minimum wordcount) that determine if and where your ads are placed.
21. SubZane YouTube Plugin. Like the Flickr Widget, this plugin allows you to automatically display the most recent YouTube videos from your YouTube account.
22. Visitor Maps and Who's Online. Displays Visitor Maps with location pins, city, and country. Includes a Who's Online Sidebar to show how many users are online and a Who's Online admin dashboard to view visitor details. The visitor details include: what page the visitor is on, IP address, host lookup, online time, city, state, country, geolocation maps and more.
23. WordPress.com Stats. Tracks views, post/page views, referrers, and clicks. Similar to Google Analytics.
24. WP Super Cache. A fast caching plugin for WordPress. If your page gets a lot of traffic, this plugin can cut down on the amount of traffic to your server while still allowing everyone to view your blog. It creates an up-to-date HTML version of your site instead of the more consuming PHP version. I do not currently have it enabled because I do not get what is commonly known as "traffic," hehe.
25. WPtouch iPhone Theme. Formats your site with a mobile theme for the Apple iPhone / iPod touch, Google Android and other touch-based smartphones.
26. Wunderground.com Weather Sticker. Adds a sidebar widget to display the standard wunderground.com Weather Sticker for your [chosen] location. Because of this widget, I actually check my own blog to get the outside temp before I go out.

If you believe what he just said in his press conference, Kurt Warner has officially retired (See, Favre? That's how it's done! None of this wishy-washy retiring business). His is one of the greatest and most improbable stories in NFL history, to say the least.

After playing in college, he was not drafted by an NFL team. He then tried out for the Green Bay Packers in 1994 but did not make the team. He (now-famously) stocked shelves at a grocery store for $5.50/hr until he signed with an AFL team in 1995. He was eventually signed as a third-string quarterback to the St. Louis Rams in 1998. Teammate's injuries forced the coach to use Kurt Warner as a "temporary" starting quarterback. In his first four games as a starting quarterback in the NFL, Warner threw a total of 14 touchdowns. He led the Rams to a Super Bowl victory that same year, throwing for 414 yards in the big game (still the most ever in a Super Bowl game). He received league MVP as well as Super Bowl MVP awards in the same season. He had a few more good seasons--including a second Super Bowl appearance--followed by a couple of shaky seasons, and the Rams released Warner in 2004.

He immediately signed a two-year deal with the Giants. After starting the 2004 season with a 5-4 record, the Giants benched Warner in favor of the rookie Eli Manning, who finished the remainder of the season with a 1-6 record. Warner signed with the Arizona Cardinals in 2005 and had two tumultuous years in which he was benched and replaced with untested quarterbacks several times. In 2008, the Kurt Warner of old was back. He made all his former teams and coaches look silly for benching (or releasing) him in the past. With the exception of losing the Super Bowl, his 2008 postseason was the best on record. He set the yardage record and tied the postseason touchdown record. The 2009 season saw him break more records and reach career milestones (such as reaching 200 career touchdowns). He had a playoff game with 5 passing touchdowns against the Green Bay Packers but was nearly shut out by the New Orleans Saints the following week. After enduring several sacks and a brutal block-from-behind following an interception, Warner left the game for a time. The Cardinals suffered a 31-point defeat to end the season (and Warner's career).

Now the talk has shifted to "does Kurt Warner deserve to be in the Hall of Fame?" Some rankings and records in favor of Warner:

• Career pass yards in Super Bowls: 1,156 (1st)
• He owns all three of the highest yardage performances in Super Bowl history.
• Pass yards in a single postseason: 1,147 (1st)
• Career MVP awards: 2 (T-3rd)
• Career Pass Yards Per Game: 258.8 (2nd)
• Career completion percentage: 65.4% (2nd)
• Pass Touchdowns in a single postseason: 11 (T-1st, Joe Montana)
• Highest completion percentage in a single regular-season game: 92.3% (1st)
• Consecutive 300+ yard passing games: 6 (T-1st)
• Number of games to reach 30,000 total yards: 114 (T-1st, Dan Marino)

The common arguments against him are his refusal to rush for yards and his tendency to be very streaky (in both the negative and positive aspects of the word), but the general feeling has shifted and most experts now believe he belongs in the NFL Hall of Fame.

Bye, Kurt. Now who will be my wife's fantasy quarterback?

I don't think Wolfram|Alpha has gotten enough publicity (not that putting it on my blog will help with that). It is definitely the next generation of search engines. It combines data from google searches, databases, and Mathematica to not only retrieve information but put it in a useful format. It also traces your IP and chooses results most likely to relate to you. For instance, if I search Springfield from my PC, it assumes I mean Springfield, Virginia because it is only a few towns over. Here are a few more examples:

weather in washington dc when rickey henderson was born. Despite the fact that Rickey Henderson was born in Chicago and has nothing to do with D.C., it retrieves his birthday and displays the weather in Washintgon, D.C. on that date. It turns the information into graph form, which is typically much more useful than straight data.

internet usage in europe. Again it displays it in a variety of forms, including a color-coded map, all which it generates real-time. It does not have to store all of this information (graphs, maps) anywhere on a server; it just calculates it as you search.

x^2 sin(x). Not sure what is going to keep people from cheating on math homework. You can go down to the derivative section and click "show steps," and it will show the answer and every step and rules that were applied.

new york. Basic city search. Shows current local weather in addition to the usual population-type stuff.

ibm apple intel. Real-time stock comparison. It not only shows current prices, but it plots graphs that historically compare the prices of the stocks you entered. It also compares their performance vs. that of the S&P500, bonds, and T-bills. This is all information that was readily available before, but this kind of comparison would have taken at least 30 minutes of work prior to Wolfram|Alpha. Now it takes seconds.

eiffel tower sears tower empire state building. It shows all measurements in standard U.S. measurements because it knows I am searching from a computer in the United States. Metric can easily be accessed, of course, by clicking "Show Metric."

2 slices bread + 8oz 2% milk + 2 eggs + 1tsp butter + 1tsp olive oil. Typical American breakfast. I included the butter for the toast and the olive oil for the eggs. It combines nutritional information for all listed ingredients and makes a food-label type list of nutritional information. Normally it would take some time and thought to calculate the calories alone in this meal. Now you can see everything from calories/fat content to Riboflavin content in seconds. If you would like to be more specific, you can change a lot of the information at the top of the page, just under the search query bar. You can change "eggs" to poached, fried, scrambled, etc. You can change the type of bread to wheat, rye, pumpernickel...

$200,000 15 year mortgage at 4.125% interest.

valentine mcdaniel huff young. Comparison of a lot of surnames in my family. It can also tell you how two people are related like daughter of my first cousin or great uncle's father's brother's daughter's son.

That's quite enough. Most categories can be expanded by clicking "More" in the upper-right corner of the results box. Also, you can save the results of any search as a .pdf file to be used in presentations and the like.

Though Emmett Miller is little remembered today, his influence was far-reaching during the dawn of country music. He was born in 1900 in Macon, Georgia, and was performing in minstrel shows as early as 1920. His backup band The Georgia Crackers included noted jazz musicians Tommy Dorsey, Jimmy Dorsey, Gene Krupa, and Eddie Lang. Some of his earliest recordings have been "lost," but his was the first voice to utilize yodel-style vocals in popular music. He performed in blackface into the early 1960's, long after it had fallen out of fashion/favor with the public. His influence on early country vocalists is most evident in early Jimmie Rodgers recordings, and Hank Williams' recording of Lovesick Blues is nearly identical to Emmett Miller's recording. Most of his recordings and performances open with skits that feature African American stereotypes and voices (such as I Ain't Got Nobody), making him a polarizing figure in the history of music.

Leon Redbone's version of "Big Bad Bill" is very similar to Emmett Miller's original recording. The same can be said of "I Ain't Got Nobody," "Sweet Mama (Papa's Getting Mad)," and many others. It seems that Miller is Leon Redbone's most direct influence, particularly in singing style and song selection.

Much of Emmett Miller's material from the 1920's can be found on archive.org if one searches his name.

On the night of September 12, 2009, a women's Semifinal match was being played at the U.S. Open. Serena Williams was down match point to Kim Clijsters when she (S. Williams) was called for a foot fault. She retaliated with a tirade and threatened bodily harm to the lines person responsible for making the call. She was penalized one point for the outburst, which cost her the match since it was match point. She was immediately fined $10,000. The incident can be seen here. Her post-match interview was unapologetic and flippant. I do not feel the need to go into the details of the actual events, because they were heavily reported at the time.

The ITF recently handed down an additional fine of $82,500 for the incident. She has not been suspended. Two days ago, she gave a somewhat official response, with a blog post hosted on globalgrind.com. Here are a few excerpts from the post:

Also for all those that don't know, I felt incredibly bad, and miserable for losing my cool, and most importantly not representing the person I really am spiritually and the role model I want to be to my young fans. [...] The fact is every professional athlete gets wronged in one way or another. And every athlete gets upset. We have been working, sacrificing, missing out on numerous things, things we will never get back or experience for the sake of our careers. [...] Well this is what happened to me, and to be honest I believe I reached my boiling point. After yet ANOTHER wrong call I began to wonder- Was I being "overlooked" or wrongly judged on purpose!??? [...] Answer this: Why is it another player who also lost HIS cool not to a line judge - like I did - but to the main officiating judge- using the same "f word" why was HE only fined 10 thousand dollars. Was what I did 10 times worse than what he did?! [...] What about the famous HE who made arguing with officials "cool". Cool for "MEN" I guess. Is it because they are all HE's and not a SHE like me?

First of all, Serena acts like this is her only transgression. She seems completely oblivious to the fact that her reputation is that of a petty, self-centered athlete who can not relate to others. When she was dismissed by Justine Henin in the quarterfinals of the 2007 U.S. Open, she pouted in the post-match press interview. "I really don’t feel like talking about it [the loss], to be honest. It’s like I don’t want to get fined. That’s the only reason I came [to the post-match interview]. I can’t afford to pay the fines because I keep losing." She also refused to admit she was outplayed by the number one player in the world, citing her own mistakes as the reason for the loss. "I think that’s usually the case with me... that it’s for me to win or lose." Face it, Serena, you got smoked by Justine Henin. She was far-and-away the best player in the world at the time. (Since Justine Henin has left the sport, there has been no clear number-one ranked tennis player on the women's side. The title of "number one player" seems to change every month).

It seems that Serena is often involved in disgraceful behavior. Smashing racquets, showing contempt for the press, and openly mocking the ratings system (and people ranked above her in this system)... none of this is uncommon. Her blog post makes it sound like she is the victim.

She brings up John McEnroe (among others) without mentioning his name. In 1987, John McEnroe was fined $17,500 and suspended for two months for misconduct and verbal abuse. Taking inflation into account (usinflationcalculator.com), this fine amounts to over $33,000 by today's standards. Saying her fine was "ten times worse" is quite a stretch. Additionaly, McEnroe was suspended for two months, while Serena received no suspension for her actions. Why isn't John McEnroe crying sexism that SHE received no suspension? How is she comparing herself to infractions that are over 20 years old? Things have changed. We don't have anyone to compare her to in recent times (except maybe Marat Safin, who never threatened anyone), so how is she able to label these punishments "sexist?"

Serena Williams seems to miss the point: While John McEnroe taunted, cursed at, and argued with officials, she threatened bodily harm to a lines person. This was more than "losing your cool." Tennis is supposed to be above this sort of thing. These aren't football players who celebrate Super Bowl wins by going out to a club and stabbing someone. There was no argument in her on-court statements. She was not trying to get the call reversed, and she was not debating any points. She was simply intimidating and threatening someone for doing their job and adhering to the rules.

A foot fault is a very cut-and-dry call. It is a very easy call to make. There are no camera angles that show for certain if there was actually a foot fault, but I believe the lines person. Her entire job during a serve is to watch the line to see if the server's foot touches the line. Unless there really is a conspiracy involved, I have to believe the call was correct. There is also the point of view that you should not let officiating determine the outcome of a sporting event. Basketball referees should not call minor fouls late in the game if the game is tied; football referees should not make calls for minor interference infractions on 4th down late in a game. I agree with this philosophy. I think the lines person was taking her job too seriously--calling a foot fault on match point. Though I believe the line judge should have "let it go," I also realize that a badly-timed call does not deserve the reaction that Serena dished out. Threatening an official in any sport is an unforgivable no-no.

She is quick to point out that $92,500 is a large amount of money ("92 thousand dollars! This is more than most people make in a year."), but nowhere does she say that 92 thousand dollars is a drop in the bucket for her. Over the course of her career, she has earned over $28million in prize money alone. That does not count her endorsements and the countless commercials she has done. I do not see her complaining about the amount of money she is making compared to the average citizen. Because of inflation (among other things), she has earned more than double the prize money that John McEnroe earned in his entire career. Look at it this way: as prize money increases, so does the amount for fines. Tennis has been good to her. You have to take the good with the bad, particularly when you brought the bad stuff on yourself.

I think the fine should have been more. I think she should have been suspended. And I assure you that my opinion has nothing to do with gender.

Most people are at least somewhat familiar with savant syndrome (savantism). Some savants can do difficult calculations in their head (I hear they are also excellent drivers... excellent drivers), while some can remember every song they have ever heard and play it back on a piano. Derek Paravicini (born 1979) is more than that--he has been called the "super savant." He not only can play back every song he's ever heard (over 10,000), but he can improvise among the best in the world.

Derek Paravicini was born quite prematurely, at 25 weeks. He is blind and severely autistic. He does not know his birthday and he can barely tell his left from his right. He can only dress/feed himself with a great deal of assistance. But let me tell you, sit him down at a piano and the boy can play. It seems that most of his brain is dedicated to music. It is not known whether his brain was born functioning this way, or if his neuron paths have slowly reconfigured (a feat thought impossible until recently) throughout his life. Here is an excerpt from his Wikipedia article:

Though autism is thought to be the source of Derek's extraordinary musical ability, his blindness may contribute. Because Derek is blind, the part of his brain that would normally be used for sight and light detection could be used for extra auditory ability. Derek is able to, with a great deal of precision and accuracy, detect and recognise not just one but multiple notes played at once (so far he can distinguish over 20 notes).

Most "normal" people, even the ones with an extremely keen musical sense (ie, perfect pitch), can only distinguish 2 or 3 notes at once. Being able to distinguish over 20 notes is way off the charts. Incredible.

I first saw a little 20 minute piece about Derek on NOVA as part of a larger episode about music and the brain. A search on YouTube brought up video about Derek put together by Ben Gooder. This TV special is phenomenal. It is 47 minutes, so it has to be split up into five parts on YouTube. The video goes into a lot more than just Derek's history and talent. A little bit of neurology and related information spread throughout. The piano playing itself isn't what makes it interesting, it's the whole picture. The portrait of a man who can not cross the street or open a bag of chips, but when he sits down at a piano, he has a level of understanding that can't be fathomed.

The Musical Genius - Derek Paravicini - Part 1

The Musical Genius - Derek Paravicini - Part 2

The Musical Genius - Derek Paravicini - Part 3

The Musical Genius - Derek Paravicini - Part 4

The Musical Genius - Derek Paravicini - Part 5

His only short-coming (and I feel like an ass for even saying that) is that he doesn't quite have a handle on all the emotions of music, though he is much better than other savants in this area. He more than makes up for it. He's the best improv musician I've ever seen. The musical limitations of his mind have yet to be discovered. You don't have to believe me; Jools Holland says the same sorts of things in the video (his opinion regarding piano expertise is worth 20 of my opinions). The icing on the cake for me is that Derek's favorite piano pieces are from the early 20th century.

"Even though it's hard to believe, I think music is an inherent part of the universe."
--David Pinto, founder of Academy of Music for the Blind

I couldn't agree more.

Virtually nothing is known about Blind Blake's life. His real name, his birth year, his birth location, and the circumstances surrounding his death are all educated guesses and hearsay. Only one picture survives of Blind Blake. He recorded about 80 sides between 1926 and 1932, though some of "his" final sides are believed to be someone other than Blind Blake. Though his singing voice wasn't as passionate as other blues singers, his guitar playing is inimitable. He was advertised as "Blind Blake and his piano-sounding guitar" and is considered by most to be the king of ragtime guitar. He was able to emulate counterpoint ragtime, including full chords and melodies, on one six-string guitar. In my mind, he was one of the best guitarist ever. It is very difficult to believe that some of his songs are played on one guitar.

His heavy drinking, along with Paramount Records' bankruptcy, led to his career (and life) ending early. Some say he was killed by a streetcar during a drinking binge at age 40.

Too Tight Blues No. 2 (1929)
Blind Arthur's Breakdown (1929)
West Coast Blues (1926)
Police Dog Blues (1929)

This article contains much more information (in the way of quotes and opinions of more recent performers) about Blind Blake and his influence.

Django Reinhardt (born Jean Baptiste Reinhardt, 1910) may not be the best guitar player ever, but he did more to promote the instrument than anyone thought possible. Django spent nearly all of his youth in gypsy encampments, and played several instruments professionally from an early age. When Django was 18, his home caught on fire while he lay sleeping, severely injuring him. He was pulled from the fire, but the burns paralyzed one of his legs and made his third and fourth fingers on his left hand inoperable. Doctors wanted to amputate his left leg, but he refused the surgery, and left the hospital against all doctors' orders. His brother bought him a guitar, and he slowly learned to play the guitar again, without the use of his ring finger or pinky. Losing the use of those fingers on the right hand would not have been such a big deal for a right-handed guitarist, but the left hand generally uses all fingers for nearly every task. Within a year, he was able to walk again with the aid of a cane.

In 1934, Django formed the Quintette du Hot Club de France with Stéphane Grappelli, violinist extraordinaire. This would become one of the only successful all-string jazz bands ever formed (though there are many copyists around today who have this same arrangement). The setup was typically three guitars, a violin, and a double bass. Some video of them playing shows the style very well. Only a few minutes of Django playing on video have survived, but this video shows off his two-finger style in an up-close segment, along with showing the whole band in action on stage.

Before Django Reinhardt, the guitar was never thought of as a lead instrument. In jazz bands of the 20's and very early 30's, the guitar was only used for chords in the rhythm section, never for leads. Blues musicians used the guitar merely as a way to accompany their voice. In the Quintette du Hot Club de France, however, guitar and violin shared equal time as lead instruments, without even a hint of horns. Like most musicians of that time period, Reinhardt's repertoire was mostly reinterpretations of famous songs from the day (Charleston-my favorite | Ain't Misbehavin | Sweet Georgia Brown | Limehouse Blues | Dinah). He was also responsible for making the Selmer Modèle Jazz guitar famous. This was the first guitar to feature a cutout, making higher frets much more accessible to the solo guitarist.

This is definitely my favorite jazz music. The style, the pace, and the instrumentation are all right up my alley. Not to mention, Django could do amazing things with only two fingers on his left hand (technically, he sometimes used his crippled fingers for chords, but never involved them in his lightning-fast solo style). Being a French band, this was the first proof that jazz had exported. A French group was not only playing jazz, but playing it well.

Reinhardt was a very eccentric fellow, sometimes skipping out on high-paying shows (unannounced) to take a stroll through town or walk the beach. Stéphane Grappelli told stories of Django throwing a fit on stage because his name was not introduced first. I found out about Django Reinhardt because of the Woody Allen film Sweet and Lowdown (1999). The movie follows a fictional guitarist in the 1930's and his obsession with Django Reinhardt (after seeing the movie, I was delighted to find out that Django was not fictional).

This video shows one of Django's guitar solos in both sheet music and guitar tab form, real-time as they are played. Pretty interesting for guitarists to look at. Much of Django Reinhardt's material can be streamed or downloaded for free if you search his name on archive.org.

Daylight Saving Time is more proof that old people run the world. One hour difference shouldn't be a big deal, should it? It often takes me a month to really get used to the time change (particularly after the "spring forward"), and I am not alone. Daylight Saving Time is a pain in the ass, plain and simple. (And by the way, Daylight Saving Time is the correct name, though Daylight Saving[s] Time is most often used.)

The brain of young adults (High School and College-aged) secretes melatonin between the hours of 11PM and 8AM, approximately. When left in a room with no time-telling devices, a teenager gravitates towards going to bed around midnight and waking up at 9AM. In this same situation, a 50 year old will go to bed around 10PM and wake up around 5AM. Sound familiar? Now this is all fine and well, except that a teenager's unwillingness to get up at 6AM for school is often interpreted as laziness or a lack of motivation (My kid doesn't like to get up for school; I think he's smoking that pot!!), when it is actually his/her natural circadian rhythm.

(For the record, my parents were excellent about understanding this phenomenon, and I was a particularly sleepy child and teenager).

The reason given for Daylight Saving Time is to preserve sunlight in the summer evenings and during Winter mornings. The only people who care about the sun rising at 6AM are old people and farmers. When William Willett proposed the idea of Daylight Saving Time, sunlight was more necessary than it is today. We now have lights in our homes, headlights on our vehicles, and alarm clocks to wake us up when it is dark outside. It is just not worth the hassle and complications! There are more accidents reported after a time change, and many of its ill-effects are still not understood. I have a five month old baby in this house, and I assure you that he does not understand the clocks having been moved back an hour. My dogs, who are fed every single evening at precisely 6PM, now start whining for food at 5PM. It takes quite a long time for them to get used to the new time (because, let's face it, it really is like feeding them at 7PM now). Now I have to deal with the sun going down at 5:30PM every day. I find that depressing, especially since it was an hour later just a few days ago.

The whole thing is just so antiquated and needs to be done away with. Who's with me? Let's march to Capitol Hill! (Okay, maybe not.)

Most Jazz fans consider Art Tatum to be the greatest jazz pianist of all time (case in point). I suppose I am not a jazz aficionado (and I am not), for I always prefer Fats Waller. Waller and Tatum were contemporaries, but while Fats Waller looked backwards to a time of Ragtime, Art Tatum looked forward, taking hundreds of years of piano technique and throwing them out the window. I much prefer the styles of the first half of the 20th century, so I am drawn to the music of Fats Waller (though I do not deny that Art Tatum had extraordinary ability and, for better or worse, reinvented jazz piano).

Thomas 'Fats' Waller was born in 1904 and made his first recordings in 1922, at the age of 18. He was taught by the great James P. Johnson, who himself taught many greats including Duke Ellington. In my mind, the death of Fats Waller was the end of stride piano, which was an extension/modernization of Ragtime. He composed many songs each year and sold them for small sums (he was known to be short-sighted and wreckless). Because of this, his compositions were often stolen by other composers claiming to have written the songs themselves. It is not known how many jazz standards were actually written by Fats Waller, but it is believed that he penned over 400 new/original songs in his short career. He was also a master of improvisation, and his improv style was much-copied for many decades. Additionally, he was well-versed in classical music and performed a number of Bach organ pieces with regularity.

Waller's real skill was on the piano and organ, but he was more than that--he was an entertainer. He was always calm and relaxed, and sang all of his tunes with levity, making sure never to take himself too seriously. All of his performances were punctuated with jokes and funny facial expressions (which was not uncommon, given the style and time period). Many of his songs had hidden meanings that were sexual in nature, such as All That Meat and No Potatoes. Many of his compositions have become jazz standards, such as Ain't Misbehavin, Honeysuckle Rose, Your Feet's Too Big, and Jitterbug Waltz.

Fats Waller led a fast life and is told to have consumed large amounts of food and alcohol at every turn. His chubby, happy persona contributed greatly to his genius never being recognized (in the opinion of this author). After all, he didn't take himself seriously, so why should anyone else?

His playing once put him at risk of injury. Waller was kidnapped in Chicago leaving a performance in 1926. Four men bundled him into a car and took him to the Hawthorne Inn, owned by gangster Al Capone. Fats was ordered inside the building, and found a party in full swing. Gun to his back, he was pushed towards a piano, and told to play. A terrified Waller realized he was the "surprise guest" at Al Capone's birthday party, and took comfort that the gangsters didn't intend to kill him. According to rumor, Waller played for three days. When he left the Hawthorne Inn, he was very drunk, extremely tired, and had earned thousands of dollars in cash from Capone and other party-goers as tips.

I'm not sure if the above story is true or not; it's from the book Fats Waller (1977). Stories like this contribute to Waller's reputation as a fast-living boozer who often affiliated with the seedier side of New York and Chicago. He continued to rise in fame and visibility until he contracted pneumonia in 1943, and died on a train near Kansas City. His ashes were spread in the air over Harlem. Louis Armstrong cried for hours when he heard of the passing of Fats Waller, or so the story goes.

This is an example of Fats' showman style. My wife's favorite:

Fats Waller - Your Feet's Too Big

Not many videos of Fats Waller are around, and most of the videos he made were for gag type songs that don't show off his skills. Some audio recordings that showcase his talent are 'Tain't Nobody's Bizness If I Do and I'm Crazy About My Baby (click the links to hear the songs, hosted on my server). If you like this style, you may want to look into this comprehensive list of Stride pianists. Also, the 1978 musical revue Ain't Misbehavin uses the music of Fats Waller to give tribute to the Harlem Renaissance and all those involved in furthering the black cause in the 1920's an 30's. Many of Fats Waller's recordings can be streamed and/or downloaded for free if you search his name on archive.org.

Just heard an interview of Ralph Stanley conducted by some pretentious NPR host. He's now 82 years old and has been making music for 63 years. He got a lot of attention when the O Brother, Where Art Thou? soundtrack was doing well. He had the only good songs on an otherwise not-so-good soundtrack.

He characterizes his style as Old-Time Mountain Music as opposed to Bluegrass. I think he falls somewhere between the two.

Bluegrass, which can be enjoyed in small doses by most people in the US, is a pop version of many forms of American Roots Music. Bluegrass mostly came about because banjo players all around the country started to copy the stylings of Earl Scruggs, and a uniform style of playing the banjo was born. Before recorded music was widely spread, American Roots Music was regional.

Although American Roots Music had a different sound all over the country, the style most commonly associated is that of Appalachian Music. Musicians out of the mountains of Kentucky, Tennessee, Virginia, and West Virginia.

Roscoe Holcomb (example 1|example 2|example 3) is a good example of Old-Time Mountain Music, as well as Clarence 'Tom' Ashley (example 1|example 2|example 3)

One of my favorite sites for a while now is archive.org (about). They focus on hosting public domain or creative commons media. A certain percentage of the archives is old material that has seen its copyright expire, while the other part of the collection was intended for public use from its conception (stock video, home videos). Among other things, this means that you can use this material in your own works without fear of being sued for copyright infringement. This is one of the reasons why classical and baroque music is used so much in television, movies and advertising: the composers are long dead and gone so there is no hassle with contacting the owner of the copyright, paying royalties, paying lawyer fees, etc.

Examples:

• If you click this, you can download (or just stream) 298 individual episodes of the old-time radio detective series Dragnet (1949-1955)
• This is a hilarious video (everything from 1990 is hilarious) about the release of Windows 3.0 and how it related to competing products at the time.
• 1949: Care of the Skin by Encyclopaedia Britannica Films. This ten-minute video covers the basics for teen cleanliness such as "the proper way to wash" and "the correct use of soap."
• Thomas Edison's oldest known voice recording is on this page, a recording of the inventor himself from 1888.
• Here is an opensource .pdf file of all the Beatles songs in sheet music format. 292 pages worth, free for download.
• On this page, you can watch someone beat Super Metroid for the SNES in 1:05 while collecting 100% of all items. I'm not sure why you would do that, but you could. You could even download high quality DivX versions of the videos and burn them to DVD.
• Searching my birthday, I found "Secret White House Recordings" of Lyndon B. Johnson from May 4, 1966

All of the material is downloadable, and all of it contains copyright information right there on the page. Some of it is free for use (no rights reserved), some of it is posted under "some rights reserved." Theoretically, all of our current entertainment will someday lose its copyright (although the lawmakers keep extending it, as much as 100 years now). One day, someone could use clips from E.T. in a film and not have to pay royalties.

(Another reason I like archive.org is they host a bunch of my music, but I'll get to that later)

John Hurt was born in Avalon, Mississippi in 1892 or 1893 (depending on what source is cited). He had 8 brothers and 2 sisters, and never finished the fourth grade. He never learned to drive a car and lived without electricity most of his life. He learned to play guitar at age 9, during the height of ragtime. The syncopation in ragtime forced him to learn a picking style different than the blues players that were born after him.

A race label, Okeh Records, agreed to record John Hurt in 1928 (they recorded and promoted him under the name Mississippi John Hurt). Starting his music career in his mid-30's, he traveled to Memphis and recorded a few songs. During his last session in late 1928, John recorded a song he had just written called "Avalon Blues," which was a tribute to his home town. Okeh would end up only releasing a few 78s of Mississippi John Hurt. They did not sell well at all, and Okeh went out of business entirely. John continued to play guitar for parties and dances until he sold his last guitar sometime around 1950. He continued farming as he had done all his life.

By the mid 50's, the study of guitar and guitar techniques was becoming more mainstream. At the time, the university of California, Berkeley, had a collection of some of the best young guitarists in the world, many of whom were trading old 78rpm records with each other, trying to learn old blues techniques. Several of the students were enamored with Mississippi John Hurt's complex fingering style and timid voice. A few of them showed one of Mississippi John Hurt's old 78rpm sides to the head of the classical guitar department at Berkeley. Listening for a minute, the professor sort of shrugged and said something to the effect of "eh, pretty good, I guess. Who's the second guitarist?" There was, of course, no second guitarist.

This story (more than likely based in legend and not in fact) made Mississippi John Hurt an instant legend among young guitarists, who assumed he was long dead and gone. Years later, a couple of young fans decided to go to Avalon, Mississippi on a gamble. John Hurt had released a song about Avalon being his hometown in 1928. Maybe he had returned there after his failed music career.

After arriving in Avalon and asking around town, they located John Hurt--on a tractor, plowing a field. It was 1962. John was in his late 60's and said he had not played guitar in many years. One of the young men pulled out a guitar, tuned it, and handed it to John Hurt. Within a minute, it was proven that his musical skills were still intact.

Mississippi John Hurt lived out the last three years of his life making up for the music career he never had. 1962 was the beginning of the folk revival (the year of Bob Dylan's first album, for example), and things could not have come at a better time for John Hurt. The Lovin' Spoonful got their band name from a song of his called "Coffee Blues." People who knew him in the 60's said he was as gentle as his music--a perfect example for all.

Many people have tried to master John Hurt's seemingly effortless fingerpicking style, but no one has even come close, in my opinion. To the novice, all of his songs sound like simple little diddies. I admit, I didn't think much of his playing when I first heard him six years ago. It all sounds simple but then you pick up the guitar and you can't even play the intro. His ability to play a syncopated melody on top of picking chords is unparalleled (not to mention that he sings on top of it. I can't even begin to imagine.)

Every guitarist looks to someone as the best of all time, and that mostly has to do with what style of music you like. My vote goes for John Hurt. This style is called Piedmont Blues (or Country Blues) and it hearkens back to the late 19th century/early 20th century, before the time of recorded music.

Here he is playing a traditional hymn on Rainbow Quest in the mid-60's. Look how gnarled and mangled his fingers are. You can tell he didn't lead a charmed life. At first it sounds like a nice simple tune, but then it starts to set in that it really sounds like two guitars going at once. Keep in mind this is less than a year before his death, and he doesn't miss a beat.

Mississippi John Hurt - You Got To Walk That Lonesome Valley

Rev. Gary Davis - Oh Glory, How Happy I Am

This is from Pete Seeger's show Rainbow Quest in the mid-60's. Rev. Gary Davis (yes, he was actually ordained as a Baptist minister. Before he became a Reverend, he went by Blind Gary Davis) makes me feel good about the world. His performances have so much warmth and emotion that I can't help but be drawn to him. This is the old-world fingerpicking style where you only use two fingers on your picking hand. It is very versatile and can lead to multi-voice guitar, much like this video. This song has an incredibly difficult guitar part, especially at the five minute mark where he does the melody on top of it. Pete Seeger is the one playing banjo at the table... Donovan and Shawn Phillips are in the background looking awkward and uncomfortable.

When discussing the "most famous movie scene ever," several famous scenes come to mind: the opening scene of Alien, the last scene in Planet of the Apes, HAL disobeying Dave, the T-Rex chasing Jeff Goldblum and company, and Moses parting the Red Sea in 1956's The Ten Commandments. There is one scene, however, that has been remade hundreds of times on film: the brutal shower scene in Psycho. This scene is referenced in everything from mocking comedy films to children's cartoons. The music is instantly recognizable (and often imitated) and still makes me uncomfortable just hearing it. Here are some facts about the famous shower scene, lifted from the pages of my Uncle John's Bathroom Reader: 4Ply Edition (©1988, 1989, 1990, 1991).

• There are approximately 65 edits in this 45 second scene.
• Although there's practically no graphic violence in the scene, it has literally scared some people out of taking showers--including Janet Leigh (the actress portraying the protagonist who is stabbed to death in the scene), who says in her autobiography that she refuses to take them anymore.
• Alfred Hitchcock later claimed he made the film as a joke.
• It took seven days to shoot the 45 second scene.
• The blood washing down the drain was actually chocolate sauce.
• Only one shot in the entire shower scene montage shows a knife entering the body and no blood is seen in that shot.
• Some shots use as little as eight frames of film (at 24fps, that's only 1/3 of a second).
• Anthony Perkins (as Norman Bates) did not actually act in the scene. He was on Broadway at the time of the shooting, starring in a play; a stand-in filled in as "Mom."
• Mixed-up priorities: According to Hitchcock, studio executives were more concerned about having a toilet flushing onscreen than they were about the implicit violence.
• Janet Leigh refused to let her daughter (actress Jamie Lee Curtis) watch the movie as a child when it appeared on TV.
• Hitchcock got the movie past censors by first submitting a script with many more horrible scenes, knowing that by allowing them to be cut he would get more leverage on the others (a tactic often used today).

Janet Leigh on the Shower Scene:

"What I was to wear in the shower scene gave the wardrove supervisor migraines. I had to appear nude, without being nude. She and I pored over striptease magazines, hoping one of their costumes would be the answer.... There was an impressive display of pinwheels, feathers, sequins, etc., but nothing suitable for our needs. Finally, the supervisor came up with a simple solution: flesh-colored moleskin.... So each morning for seven shooting days and seventy-one setups, we covered my private parts, and we were in business.

"For sundry reasons, we had to do [the scene] over and over. At long last a take was near completion without a mishap. Abruptly I felt something strange happening around my breasts. The steam from the hot water had melted the adhesive on the moleskin, and I sensed the napped cotton fabric peeling away from my skin. What do to?...I opted for immodesty...and made the correct judgment. That was the printed take."

(By the way, I highly recommend the Uncle John's Bathroom Reader series for articles and facts about anything and everything).