Evan Valentine, Stay-at-Home Dad

News from the newest Valentine family

Archive for the ‘text’ Category

Masta Verbalists (Thuggin’ It 2.0)

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A while back, I made a post featuring a track by an mp3.com artist named Thuggin' It. Apparently there are very few people who remember Thuggin' It the way I do (here is one place that talks about it and titles the post "Worst Rap Song EVER!"). Though I didn't mention it in my post, I knew of another song that the kid had released under a different name, presumably because the material released under his Thuggin' It moniker was the butt of so many jokes. I searched the internet, I searched my hard drive, and I asked a few friends about it. No one knew what I was talking about (or even believed such a thing existed, quite frankly). I went through my ancient "misc mp3" folder and listened to every song that I didn't recognize. I couldn't find the song anywhere. Why would I have deleted such a gem?

I had one last-ditch effort. I contacted my cousin David (with whom I lived for three summers) because I know we definitely used to rock out to both of those songs. He still has his old PII up and running as a toy for his 16month old daughter. He said it was running very slowly, the registry full of junk, and his daughter had all but destroyed the mouse and keyboard, but he would look for it. The next night I received a text message: "Masta Verbalists - Welkome 2 Our World."

Sometime that weekend he was able to get the file off his old PC and email it to me. I have searched quite a bit for any reference to this song on the internet, and it seems to have vanished from the collective unconscious. So I am proud to say that I have exclusive content of this awful track, released by the Thuggin' It crew under a different name. His voice is immediately recognizable.

Masta Verbalists - Welkome 2 Our World

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March 9th, 2010 at 5:45 pm

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Untitled

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Like everything else in my life, this blog goes in very severe phases. During the times that I actually want to work on it, I develop a backlog of saved drafts to post on later dates where I may not be so motivated. The last several days have been a pretty good example of that. One of my many Useless Facts post, a little post about what I listen to on satellite radio, blah blah. These were pre-prepared.

We got this kid a music-themed activity table. It stands about 18" off the ground and has about 25 buttons you can push and get different responses. It has "speaking mode" and "music mode" which has no words. He only likes it if I put Cheerios in the pocket. Then it's his favorite.

Weekend was great. Concerts were great. Thanks again to Martha and Eric for holding us a table at Leon Redbone. We had good seats. Leon Redbone is a very odd man. Every time I see him in concert, there is more silence between songs, and more weird things like playing the same songs twice. He did two doubles in his set on Friday. Weird.

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March 8th, 2010 at 6:17 pm

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Useless Facts [Part 8]

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  • Albert Einstein's last words were spoken in German. Since the attending nurse did not know the language, we'll never know what he said.
  • A termite can live thirty years.
  • A snail takes 115 days to travel a mile.
  • Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde was the result of a Robert Louis Stevenson dream. Stevenson claimed that he was able to dream plots for his stories whenever he felt like it.
  • Teddy Roosevelt had four sons. Three of them were killed serving their country during wartime.
  • A giraffe can kill a lion with one kick.
  • Pablo Picasso's real name was Pablo Diego José Francisco de Paula Juan Nepomuceno María de los Remedios Cipriano de la Santísima Trinidad.
  • An electric eel will short-circuit itself if it is put into salt water.
  • The face of comic book hero Captain Marvel was modeled after Fred MacMurray.
  • English writer Ben Johnson was buried standing up in Westminster Abbey because he couldn't afford normal grave space.
  • Octavio Guillen and Adriana Martinez were married in Mexico city in 1969 after a world record engagement of 67 years.
  • Oh! Susanna earned composer Stephen Collins Foster the grand sum of fifty dollars.
  • C.W. Post introduced coupons in 1895 when he offered one cent off to kick off sales for his new cereal, Grape Nuts.
  • There were no significant historical accomplishments during the Millard Fillmore administration. He did, however, negotiate a deal with Peru over the use of guano--bird droppings.
  • A duck frequently swims while sleeping.
  • The Statue of Liberty's pedestal was more expensive than Lady Liberty herself.
  • Tooth decay is the most widespread noncontagious disease in the world.
  • According to an old English time unit, one moment is 90 seconds.
  • The average office chair on wheels travels about eight miles per year.

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March 7th, 2010 at 10:24 pm

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My Sirius XM Stations + Reggae Songs

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Our car has three banks of six XM station presets. One of the banks is mine. These are my stations.

  1. Lithium: Can't go wrong with 90's alt-rock.
  2. 40's on 4: Self explanatory. I really, really wish they had a 30's station.
  3. Chill: Downtempo electronic, also including trip-hop and ambient.
  4. The Joint: Reggae.
  5. Bluegrass Junction
  6. Raw Dog Comedy: Uncensored stand-up comedy.

Since the stations I listen to are not very popular, most of them feature commercials which is quite annoying. Despite whittling down 150+ stations to six, none of them are particularly good. I mostly switch between Reggae and Raw Dog Comedy. Oh well, it's my wife's car, and she loves Sirius XM... and it was free! (my aunt re-activated our account as a Christmas present).

Speaking of Reggae, here are some of my favorite lesser-known tracks.

Tiken Jah Fakoly - Le Pays Va Mal - Reggae in French from the Ivory Coast. Political lyrics (translated)
Beres Hammond - Just Like A Woman
Melodians - Rivers Of Babylon - Most people don't know the Sublime version is a cover of this
Bob Marley - Mr. Brown - Not one of his popular tracks, but a great and fun song

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March 6th, 2010 at 7:44 pm

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Concerts

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Last night began the concert gluttony with Gaelic Storm. It was a good concert. Tonight it's Leon Redbone at 7:30. I'm excited.

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March 5th, 2010 at 2:12 pm

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TV Habits, Ubuntu, Laptop Repair

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I'm getting back into a non-tv phase. This is a good thing--a very good thing. I used to watch cartoons all morning with Stephen, and then leave it on ESPN's endless loop of Sports Center all day. There is no reason to watch ESPN at all anymore since football is over. Without Merril Hoge, there is no analysis worth watching. Merril Hoge is the best post-game analysis personality, in any sport, on any channel. You have to ignore the fact that nearly all of his predictions are wrong; that is not his thing. I love all of his little "inside the play" replays.

I should just cancel all of my DVR recordings (PBS' Nature, FRONTLINE, Nova) and stop downloading documentary specials. I don't watch any of them. I just watch 60 Minutes every week. That's it. I'm listening to more music as a result, and writing more blog entries. (It's not all good, however. I spend a lot of time on link sites).

The verdict is that I really like Linux Ubuntu. If something goes wrong or does not work "out of the box," things get very difficult, very fast. For instance, my Logitech webcam was working in every program except Skype, but after searching a lot of forums, I found that the webcam works in Skype when I load it by typing "LD_PRELOAD=/usr/lib/libv4l/v4l1compat.so skype" instead of just typing "skype." It was a pain to figure out, but now that I know, it's not a big deal. It would be much harder if I wasn't running GNOME. This old laptop doesn't even have enough power to run Skype video chat in Windows XP, so I don't actually have any other options.

Speaking of that, I spent about a hundred bucks last night to repair/upgrade this laptop (Dell laptop from 2004). This old battery lasts 7 minutes when unplugged, and the keyboard is kind of destroyed, so I spent about 50 bucks buying replacements for both of those. Hopefully replacing the keyboard is as easy as it looks. I also spent 49 bucks on 2gigabytes of memory. I'd like to extend the life of this laptop for at least a few more years. Running linux is already helping me turn this little pony into a fast horse, and upgrading the memory should make everything run smoothly even though I like to keep lots of software open (and 10+ tabs in my web browser).

Now that my photos site is all debugged and displaying properly, I have no excuse not to finish it. Still need to finish my little bio/profile/about page, and I'm going through several years of photographs, finding a few of the best ones to add. That is where they have been/will be some photos on here recently from a few years ago.

Written by Evan

March 3rd, 2010 at 10:22 am

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Teeth?

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My son has just cried for two days straight. I don't know if he has more teeth coming in or what, but he is one pissed off kid. Here is a pretty common exchange:

he: [Reaches for coffee mug on coffee table]
me: "No no... that's hot" [I move it to the direct center of the coffee table]
he: "I hate you, Dad! I hate you and I hate this family, and I wish I was never born! This house is stupid and I hate these clothes and I'm gonna run away and never come back!"

Seems a bit of an overreaction. Then I take him up to his room where he cries while playing with all his toys. Like, he's opening and closing his "spin and learn" alphabet book over and over, and spinning the letters, all while crying at maximum capacity with tears running off his chin. I don't know if some teeth are about to come through, but I hope so. That would mean there is an end in sight. I'm really sick of this.

Written by Evan

March 2nd, 2010 at 2:15 pm

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Monkee Business

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The Monkees were one of the most popular bands in the world, but weren't
allowed to play on their own records--until they went on strike. Here's the inside
story, from
Behind the Hits, by Bob Shannon and John Javna (out of print).

From the outside, everything looked great for The Monkees in 1967. In one year they had leaped from semi--or total--obscurity to overnight superstardom. They had a hit TV series, two #1 singles ("Last Train to Clarksville," and "I'm A Believer"), and two #1 albums ("The Monkees," and "More of The Monkees"). The only problem was the Monkees weren't allowed to play on their own records. Why not? Because Don Kirshner, the musical supervisor of The Monkees, said so. It was... well... embarassing. Here they were, pretending to be a real group, when in fact they had almost nothing to do with "their" music. Critics made fun of them. Even worse, teenyboppers idolized them for something they weren't doing. And to add insult to injury, Kirshner made more money from their records than they did. They each got a 1.5% royalty, but Kirshner go 15%! They had their pride, after all.

Trouble had been brewing for some time between Kirshner and the group, particularly Mike Nesmith, who wasn't even allowed to play guitar on the songs he wrote. That was Kirshner's studio policy, The Monkees just sang vocals while studio musicians played on the tracks. But what the hell, Kirshner reasoned, he was getting results--hits--and that was his job. So what if Nesmith had to stand by and watch Glen Campbell put the guitar licks on his own song, "Mary Mary"? This was the only way management could be sure it was right. The bottom line was what counted, after all. Nesmith, a genuinely creative individual, just stewed.

"Essentially, the big collision I had with Don Kirshner was this," said Nesmith; "he kept saying, 'You can't make the music; it would be no good, it won't be a hit.' And I was saying, 'Hey, the music isn't a hit because somebody wonderful is making it, the music is a hit because of the television show. So, at least let us put out music that is closer to our personas, closer to who we are artistically, so that we don't have to walk around and have people throwing eggs at us,' which they were."

Eventually the feud came to a showdown in early '67 at Kirshner's suite at the Beverly Hills Hotel. Kirshner had just handed the four Monkees some new demos (including "Sugar, Sugar," a bubblegum hit later for Kirshner's Archies) that they would be putting vocals on. Nesmith stepped forward and demanded that musical control be given to The Monkees. When Kirshner refused, Nesmith angrily smashed his fist through the wall, declaring, "That could have been your face!" Then The Monkees went off to record some original material without Kirshner's approval.

What happened next is a little unclear. While The Monkees were working out their own songs, Kirshner appears to have approached Davy Jones, one of the members of the group, and talking him into going into the studio without the rest of The Monkees. Jones put the vocals on several tunes, one of which was "A Little Bit Me, A Little Bit You." But The Monkees weren't doing the backing vocals. Who was it? Eric Lefcowitz, author of The Monkees Tale, speculates "Kirshner was quoted once as saying that Neil Diamond and Carole King had sung back-up vocals on some Monkees songs, and I think that if you listen closely to 'A Little Bit Me,' you can hear them. It sounds like Neil Diamond to me." And why would Jones record without the rest of the group? "I don't know, of course," Lefcowitz says, "but Davy Jones hadn't ever had the chance to sing lead before. This was his session. Maybe that had something to do with it."

Maybe, maybe not. The important thing is that in a power play, Kirshner recorded and released "A Little Bit Me, A Little Bit You" without even telling The Monkees he was doing it! That was the last straw. Monkees' producers Bob Rafelson and Bart Schneider wanted hits, but they weren't going to put up with that from anyone. They fired Kirshner, and yanked the single out of American record stores. Then they re-released it with a Monkees original--Nesmith's "The Girl I Knew Somewhere"--on the B side. Finally The Monkees could smile. They were out from under Kirshner... and a song they'd actually played on made the Top 40--"The Girl I Knew Somewhere" reached #39 on the charts.

Written by Evan

February 27th, 2010 at 10:32 pm

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Winter Olympics

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I'm sorry folks, but I just can not get into the Winter Olympics. I should preface this [rant] by saying I grew up outside of Atlanta, so ice and snow are quite foreign to me. It was rare that I even met someone who had ever been skiing (water skiing doesn't count).

The Winter Games feature far too many competitions that are either a) boring, b) not sports or c) determined by judges.

Am I really supposed to believe that bobsledders are brilliant athletes because they lean into turns to shave 0.02 seconds off their time? It's like having a competition to see who can get down the playground slide the fastest. What's next? Log flume races? A roller coaster competition?

Then there's curling, another non-sport. Look, if you can excel at something while elderly or inebriated, it is not a sport (that goes for you too, Bowling). I understand that it is a game of millimeters and it requires precision and whatnot, but so does Billiards. Billiards has not made it to the summer games because the summer games are full of real sports and do not need all of this filler to draw fans.

Then there is the biathlon, which is the equivalent of the marathon race in the Summer Olympics, except with firearms(?). Involving firearms in an athletic competition is like NASCAR--the car/gun does all the work! I've heard the argument that race car drivers are athletes because they "have to train a lot" and "go on a special diet." You know who else has to go on a special diet? Supermodels! Marksmen can't even claim that. I'm sure there is at least one severely overweight, unathletic marksman in the world.

But, at least the above events are not decided by judges.

If you win something because you received the highest score(s) from a panel of judges, you do not deserve a medal; you deserve a blue ribbon. And up next on the winter games, the science fair qualifying event! I realize that the summer Olympics has its share of events determined by judges (diving, gymnastics), but the Winter Olympics seems to have a lot more of these events. Figure skating and gymnastics fall under the same category for me. It's a high-end dance competition determined by judges. I don't care what anyone says, judges are biased (and they can be paid off). If you have a difficult routine, and you don't make any mistakes, who is to judge who actually won the competition? Does it really come down to who pointed their toes? Up next here on NBC, it's Ice Dancing With the Stars--Olympic Edition! I'm Tom Bergeron; don't touch that dial.. I'm not disparaging the competitors in this case (because gymnasts, snowboarders, aerial skiers, and divers are all athletes, unlike curlers), but I don't think an Olympic competition should be decided by judges.

Why is it that snowboarding has made it into the Winter Olympics, but skateboarding has not made it into the Summer Games? Again, it is because the Summer Olympics does not need all of this filler to draw viewers/interest. They can afford to be "choosy" when it comes to allowing new sports. Don't get me wrong, I think Shaun White is nothing short of a badass. I think he would win no matter how the competition was set up.

If you run a 100m footrace, then you have a chance of breaking the world record, but if you ride down the super halfpipe on a snowboard while doing flips, you can only win for that day. There is no universal standard you can hold someone up to. You can't call Guinness after receiving a high score on a judged event, because you haven't really accomplished anything definite.

So here's what the Winter Olympics have that I'll watch: speed skating, hockey, and the different ski races. Pretty sad list.

Written by Evan

February 26th, 2010 at 3:59 pm

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How Many Posts Can I Title “Stuff”?

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There is a lot of talk recently about enacting new "Financial Literacy" requirements in order for students to finish High School in this area. A lot of schools have pushed back the launch of the program for another year because of budget problems. So, the states who mismanaged their money are teaching our children about financial literacy? Am I the only one bothered by this? To quote Bill Hicks, "It's irony on a base level, but I like it. It's still a hoot."

I got this link off fazed.org: The 100 best free science documentaries online. This is my kind of thing. Documentaries. Free. Online. The list loses a great deal of credibility when Super Size Me is the first "science documentary" on the list, though. Just saying.

Michał Jacaszek finally came to America. Just come do D.C. and I'm there! A partial clip from his concert in NY on Feb 11:

Jacaszek - Lament - Le Poisson Rouge NYC 02/11/2010

I like to say how much I love Lightroom and that I don't miss Photoshop at all. This is only partially true. I sort of have to say that because I spent $299 on Lightroom version 1. With that money, you get all 1.xx upgrades until version 2 comes out, then you have to pay $99 to get all version 2.xx upgrades. I saved my $99 and did not get version 2, but version 3 is coming out this April, and I will spend the 99 bucks on it. They have put some Photoshop-like features in that will make me miss Photoshop even less, such as the ability to make selections, the ability to combine photos into HDR images, and improved features all-around, notably sharpening and noise reduction.

I have been wearing Acuvue 2 contacts for about ten years. These are now considered the "old style." They have advanced several generations since then. Now the contact lenses are made of different material and they allow your eyes to "breathe" more. When I got an eye exam two weekends ago, the optometrist gave me one pair of Acuvue Oasys and one pair of my good old standbys, Acuvue 2. I put on the Oasys contacts at the doctors office, and at first my vision wasn't as clear as it should have been. I think that after I got used to them, they were fine, since I do not notice a major difference right now (I just switched to the Acuvue 2 pair about ten minutes ago). The side of the story that I did not tell my optometrist is that I never take proper care of my contacts/eyes. I leave them in for 2-3 weeks without ever taking them out before bed. This is why I am leaning towards the newer, more expensive contacts that allow oxygen transfer through the lens. Another notable thing from my exam: I haven't needed a stronger prescription in the last two years, so that's a good thing.

I finally figured out what makes my desktop PC freeze. It's µTorrent, which is supposed to be the bittorrent client that is more streamlined. Before I had µTorrent, I was using Vuze, but that was too bloated and so forth. Anyone have any suggestions of torrent management software (preferably one with a smaller footprint than Vuze or BitComet)?

I take 3mg of melatonin before bed every night. Well, every night that I don't forget. I have been doing it for about a year now, and I really like it as a sleep aid. It is a naturally occurring biochemical, so it doesn't have the same effect as a "drug" would. The purpose is not to make you really sleepy or groggy; it just makes you feel naturally tired. Around 20-40minutes after taking it, I just sort of yawn and say "I think I should go to bed now. That would be good." It has other advantages, too, like the fact that it allows me to get up feeling completely normal if Stephen starts crying at 2am (where 99% of sleep aids make it much harder to get up before you have gotten 8hrs of rest). It is safe, has no side effects, and has no chance of addiction. The problem is that an overwhelming majority of the population says that melatonin has no effect on them. I will say that it took two weeks of me taking it every night before it had an effect on me. Maybe I wasn't noticing the subtleties before that, or maybe my body had not gotten adjusted to 3mg of melatonin at roughly the same time every day. No idea, but I like it.

And finally, How Tough are NES Games? Answer: really, really tough. Like, getting-run-over-by-a-car-and-still-working tough. Like, getting-dropped-thirty-feet-onto-concrete-and-still-working tough. (Note: usually when I find out about a YouTube video via another blog, I don't actually link to the blog post, but this is my friend Martha's blog, so I didn't take the credit this time)

Edit: fazed.org copied me for once (not really), and put up a link to the 60 Minutes story about the Bloom Box. Nice try, copycats! I was first!

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February 25th, 2010 at 9:05 am

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Leon Redbone

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Leon Redbone is a fringe performer with a dedicated following. I have seen him 8 or 9 times in concert.. if that's not dedication, I don't know what is. I have traveled to different states on more than one occasion to see him. I was literally the only one left to see his last 3 songs during a hurricane in Chattanooga at an outdoor concert. Leon Redbone strikes a chord with some people, and I am one of them. I am seeing him again next Friday, and I'm already excited.

Redbone's history begins at the beginning of his career because virtually nothing is known about his background or personal life. His real name, birthday, country of origin and ethnicity are all unknown, though people have speculated about these things for 35+ years now. He has claimed to have been born in Bombay during a monsoon to parents Niccolò Paganini (a composer and violinist who died in 1840) and Jenny Lind (a singer who died in 1887), which contributes to the mystique about his age. He has also listed his date of birth as October 29, 1929, the day of the stock market crash that sent America into the Great Depression. He often claims (erroneously, of course) that songs written well before his time were "stolen" from him. It hearkens back to the days before information was so readily available about celebrities' personal lives and upbringing. It appears he has worked very hard to create and maintain this mystique.

Leon Redbone has made a career out of arranging and performing songs that originated before my grandparents' time, though he attracts a wide and varied audience, ranging in ages and musical tastes. His style is hard to pin down as it is a mix of old-time blues, ragtime, jazz, country, and vaudeville. If it were necessary to sum up his style, one might say he does cleaned-up renditions of Tin Pan Alley classics from the 1920's and 30's. He has a very unique voice and is able to pull a lot of yodel-style octave jumps. He is also an excellent acoustic guitarist, which is often obscured by his interesting baritone vocal stylings. He is somehow able to emulate all the counterpoint of ragtime on a six-string acoustic guitar--a feat not attempted by many. Upon his arrival to the music scene, Leon Redbone was rumored to be an alter-ego of Bob Dylan, Andy Kaufman and even Frank Zappa.

He composed/performed the theme song to Mr. Belvedere (and apparently composed/performed the theme song to the sitcom version of Harry and the Hendersons, which I did not know existed). He voiced the character Leon the Snowman in the 2003 film Elf, where he was also featured heavily in the soundtrack and film score.

Seeing Leon Redbone live is akin to stepping in a time machine. His fedora hat, dark sunglasses and cane contribute to the mystery and timelessness of the act. The stage versions of his songs are stripped down to the bare essentials. For the past ten years or so, he most often performs with just a trumpet player and pianist. His act is peppered with banter and jokes that feel over a century old. He often shuffles through papers and proposes "a sing-along" to his instrumentalists; the suggestion is met with a sigh and eyerolls as Leon breaks into song (usually "I've Been Working on the Railroad" or "Twinkle Twinkle, Little Star"). At the end of nearly every show, he re-emerges on stage to take a picture of the audience. If I were to ever develop a stage presence, I often wonder which of Leon Redbone's stage gimmicks I would "borrow."

Here is a video of Leon performing Please Don't Talk About Me When I'm Gone, originally released in 1930:

Some of those guitar licks are extremely difficult. It is very laid-back and does not give that impression, but do not be fooled. This is the magic of Leon Redbone. It sucks that his left hand is obscured in this particular camera angle. Here are some more videos...

On Alf's talk show
I Ain't Got Nobody
Walking Stick
Harvest Moon (better version than the Alf one)
Leon Redbone can certainly whistle

Written by Evan

February 24th, 2010 at 8:59 am

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Nine Months

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Stephen had his nine month checkup today. He has fallen to the tenth percentile in weight. Doctor said it's not a big deal and that it doesn't mean he's not getting enough to eat, but he also said "We'll have to keep an eye on his weight next time." Yeah, really? You mean you're going to weigh him next time? Wow. He got one shot and got blood drawn to test for Anemia. He was a champ for the shot, didn't even make a move. Then I had to take him down to the lab, still unclothed, to get blood drawn for a standard 9month Anemia test.

This is where things went south. We got our name called quickly, the nurse got Stephen's ticket and went back to the back area where the "boss man" was, and asked how they should proceed, etc. I could see and hear them through a little open area and they couldn't figure out how old he was for like three minutes. Then they had every nurse in there... "you hold his hand, I'll hold his head, we'll put this bar down over his legs.. ok, ready?"

So, they tied the tourniquet on his upper left arm and proceeded to stick him inside his left elbow about 20 times without finding the vein. Stephen never even moved or cried or looked like he felt it at all. Then they switched to the right arm. After about 20 more pricks (no exaggeration), they found a vein. Stephen felt this and was a little upset. Since they had all given up hope on this working, everyone had abandoned their stations, so Stephen's hand and foot were unrestrained (he was sitting in my lap this whole time, but there's only so much I can do). He began wiggling around and crying a little bit, and the guy was like "we lost it."

So THEN, with gauze taped to the inside of both of Stephen's elbows, they pricked his thumb and collected a whole vial of blood drop by drop. They let some drip on my pants.. ugh.. it was quite clear that I thought they were inept. They kept marveling at how good Stephen was being, and apologizing to me. Their (approximately one dozen) apologies were met with cold, silent stares, but other than that I was polite, patient, and understanding.

Things like this are the disadvantage of not going to a Pediatrician. We take Stephen to a general practitioner, because he is my doctor and I like him. I don't have a problem with the doctor at all, but when it comes to performing procedures on a tiny human body, some of the people are not very experienced. All in all, it was much worse for me than it was for Stephen. He cried for a total of three minutes, which is probably what would have happened if everything had gone as planned.

The reason they do not typically prick the thumbs of babies quickly became evident as the guy put three band aids on Stephen's thumb, all while Stephen was trying to stick his thumb in his mouth. The whole time I was checking out, we were battling over what Stephen put in his mouth. I would put the pacifier in; he would spit it out and stick his thumb in there. Then, back in the waiting room on my way out, I got Stephen dressed again. I kept his whole right arm inside the outfit so he couldn't suck his thumb. By the time I got home, I pulled his arm through the sleeve and took the band aids off. The bleeding had stopped. We managed to not ruin anything with blood stains (my pants are dark grey so they should be fine). He was extremely tired after his HIB shot, but now he's happy as a clam and standing next to the shelves where we keep his toys, destroying everything in sight.

Age: 9months
Height: 28.5"
Weight: 17lbs, 10oz
Head Circum: 17.5"

Related charts, graphs, etc.

Written by Evan

February 23rd, 2010 at 9:48 am

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Weather, Links, Concerts, Stuff

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The forecast for Manassas has changed. Instead of two straight days of snow, it is supposed to rain all day today and tomorrow. Possibly we will get a snowstorm on Thursday now. So maybe the rain will clean up all the snow and sand for a couple days, then it will dry up on Wednesday, and then we will get more snow. We'll see. My car still has snow on it and Stephen has a Dr. appointment at 8:10am tomorrow. I hope the rain comes today and cleans off my car. Then I will have officially gotten away with never cleaning 30" of snow off my car.

There was an interesting story on the most recent 60 Minutes about The Bloom Box. This is yet another alternate power source that people think might slowly start to replace our current grid. It is compact, wireless (yes, wireless electricity) and "clean." John Doerr, the famous venture capitalist in Silicon Valley, has contributed over $100million to K.R. Sridhar and his company, who have raised nearly half a billion dollars in capital. John Doerr has invested in some famous flops, namely the Segway Scooter. Like the Segway was supposed to revolutionize travel in the U.S., this new power source is supposed to revolutionize the way we power our homes. Everyone would theoretically get their own little box (it really is quite small, about 4" cubed) in their back yard and generate their own power. K.R. Sridhar made the same type of invention for NASA before he ventured into the private sector.

I just sent off a request to this place for a week in August. We are trying to take a vacation with both sides of our family. This place would be ideal. It is close to the ocean and right on a lake. This way, my dad could bring his jet skis and Jaime and her dad could go deep sea fishing. It has internet, pool table, two family rooms, three floors, a pool.. even an elevator, hehe. We only have one week of availability because Billy is enrolled in classes all summer and his fall semester starts in late August. We narrowed down the list last night based on availability and pet allowance. Hopefully everything works out. It will be nice to have the planning of this out of the way. It looks like a good place for photos. I may try to rent a zoom lens for that week.

I have a good couple of weeks coming up. My brother Robert is visiting for his spring break the week of March 7. My brother Billy is visiting for his spring break the week of March 14. Back-to-back weeks. I am going to The Birchmere three times in less than two weeks. Gaelic Storm on March 4 with a group of six. Leon Redbone on March 5 with a group of five. Bobby McFerrin on March 17 with Billy. The Birchmere won't go out of business as long as I'm still in this area.

Stephen is officially nine months old today. His Uncle Gavin is officially twenty-six years old today. It was thirty years ago today that the U.S. hockey team (comprised of U.S. college players) upset the four-time defending gold-medal winning Soviet team, which of course had a lot of political implications as well.

Here is an article about many convergent studies on the potentially negative effects of ingesting fluoride, complete with more links and citations than you'd ever care to click. Fluoride is, of course, good for your teeth; a lack of fluoride accelerates tooth decay. That is why fluoride is in toothpaste and mouthwash... but you don't swallow toothpaste and mouthwash. Fluoride is also in nearly all tap water in the United States, and is not removed by Brita or Pur home water filtration systems. It also can not be removed from water by boiling or freezing your water. I don't believe fluoride in our water is a big conspiracy like Alex Jones does, but I leave open the possibility that we as a nation may have rushed into the fluoridation of our water supply without thinking. We seem to place a lot of emphasis on teeth and beauty, sometimes above all else. (What's the first thing Americans say about the British population as a whole? Man, those Brits have some ugly teeth).

On a lighter note: The weirdest video you will see today. This is more a testament to my odd sense of humor than anything.

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February 22nd, 2010 at 8:34 am

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Firsts

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Stephen had a few "firsts" yesterday. He took his first step (from holding onto the dog to holding onto his mom). Jaime doesn't think it was a step, but he was holding onto the dog, then he let go. He moved one of his feet forward (towards Jaime) and then planted it on the ground. Then he grabbed onto Jaime. I consider that a step. He also had his first (two) french fries.

I hate it when I come up with a new tag for this blog after the fact. A conversation I had with Krystle last night made me think I should have a "firsts" tag where I can track the approximate date of all all Stephen's firsts. First time sitting up, rolling over.. all that. So now I am searching through 330 posts to find firsts and re-tagging them retroactively. What a pain.

Edit: Okay, searching for things like first, roll, skills, and sitting, I was able to come up with a fair amount of "firsts." You can follow the the tag here. I was not able to find a real date on when he first sat up on his own, but it seems to be somewhere in the middle of the 4th month.

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February 21st, 2010 at 2:25 pm

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Monte the Betta

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I don't understand this Betta. He just passes out for extended periods of time. Every time he does it, I swear he's dead. It looks like his gills aren't moving, and he won't come to life if you put food in his bowl or tap the glass.

Last night he was just floating on the top for about an hour, lifeless. Right now he's lying motionless on his side on the bottom of the tank... just kind of sprawled on some rocks. It's weird, scary, unsettling, disconcerting, all that.

Seizures? Coma? Normal Betta behavior? Practical Joker? You decide.

Regardless, I keep thinking he's going to die.

Edit: Okay, this time he's really dead. Our last fish lasted two years before he committed suicide. This fish lasted five days.

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February 19th, 2010 at 1:24 pm

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Stupidity in Action

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(The title of this post refers to the bottom section of the post. I'm sure you'll agree that it is stupidity in action)

There are rumors of another big snowstorm on the horizon. No one is saying how big or what portion of it is hysteria, but the current Wolfram|Alpha prediction for Manassas is snow all day Monday and Tuesday (Feb. 22nd and 23rd). I still haven't dug my car out of the snow from Feb. 6th and 9th.

We got another fish for our one-fish bowl this weekend. He is a red Betta named Monte. I took several pictures, but none are any good. I'll get one eventually. Aquarium photography is nearly impossible.

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Steve (my friend) and I were watching this video last night, and it made Stephen (my son) so happy for some reason. He had a big huge smile while he rocked his head and pulled on some guitar strings. It was quite adorable.


The Morning Benders - Excuses

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I have already showed the following link to most everyone I know, but I'm posting it here anyway so I can lay it to rest.

    Q: Who polices the police?

    A: Police police police police.

    The first two words mean "those who police the police." It's like "fashion police" or "fun police" but it's police for the police. The third word is the verb. The last word is the initial "police" that need policing. It could also be

    A: The police police are the ones who police the police

    But that's not as cool (I don't know if "cool" is the right word here, heh).

Another more extreme example is this:

    Buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo.

    The above is a grammatically correct sentence because the word "buffalo" is a) a city b) a transitive verb meaning to bully or intimidate, and c) an animal (both singular and plural). One translation is "[Those] buffalo(es) from Buffalo [that are intimidated by] buffalo(es) from Buffalo intimidate buffalo(es) from Buffalo."

    Or "Bison from Buffalo, New York who are intimidated by other bison in their community also happen to intimidate other bison in their community."

Steve and I were trying to think of another one last night. If "orange" was a verb (meaning "to color something orange" maybe?) you could do something interesting.

    Orange's orange oranges orange Orange's oranges.

    Or "Orange-colored oranges from Orange county paint Orange county's [other] oranges an orange color."

Oh well, that's a fake one, but that's the best we could do. The wikipedia article says the same type of construction can be made with the words dice, fish, right and smelt.

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February 18th, 2010 at 8:39 am

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Ubuntu

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Well, I'm composing this post in linux (Ubuntu 9.10, to be exact). Now I can be an elitist. Yay.

They make it so easy to set up a dual boot. You can download a "Windows Installer" that automatically sets up a partition and the dual boot screen when you restart. It also leaves Windows XP as the default boot option (something that doesn't take over your PC, how refreshing).

First and foremost, when you set up a new computer or operating system, you try to get on the internet. Well, that didn't work for me. After reinstalling Ubuntu three separate times, printing about 50 pages of forum nonsense, and typing "sudo [command]" about 200 times, I finally got Ubuntu to recognize the WiFi card in this laptop. I was immediately introduced to the negative aspects of linux. Supporters of linux say "It's not linux' fault that manufacturers don't make drivers for linux!" I had to use ndiswrapper to convert Windows XP drivers into linux drivers. Finding the correct drivers was a snap, the rest is entirely linux' fault. They have to know that a lot of people are going to encounter the same problem that I did, and they do absolutely nothing to make it intuitive to new users. I had to download 4 packages (installers for utilities/software) on another computer, burn them to a cd, install them in Ubuntu, and then figure out how to use the wrapper. Then I had to diagnose what the conflicts were and remove the other...... okay, I'm bored typing this, so I can only imagine how it is reading it. I'll stop now.

The point: it is definitely linux' fault that this nonsense isn't at all accessible. I am in at least the 98th percentile of computer users, and it took me 8-10 hours of work to get the internet on this sleek, modernized installation of linux. There is nowhere I can go and click "disable all default WiFi drivers," for instance, which would have saved me a lot of time. At least do something to try to make it intuitive for new users. From what I read, my problem occurs in a large percentage of Ubuntu installs, yet there is still no easy (or even reasonable) fix.

I guess it's just a different mindset.

There are some advantages I have already found. You update all your software from one window. Just a few clicks, and all the software on your whole setup is updated at once. Also, Ubuntu natively supports a desktop that is twice as big as your monitor. Just scroll over, and you have the space of a whole other desktop. It also natively supports scrolling by dragging with two fingers at once on the trackpad (like a MAC). That's something that could get addicting. I already use it kind of naturally when browsing. No need to find the scroll bar to browse further down on a web page. We'll see how this pans out.

Also, all software downloads files to the same place. Adjusting the colors/theme of your setup takes effect on all installed software.

Written by Evan

February 17th, 2010 at 9:14 am

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Useless Facts [Part 7]

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  • An ant has five noses.
  • The T.I.D. often found on a doctor's prescription stands for "ter in die," a Latin term meaning "three times a day."
  • The home team must provide a referee with 24 footballs for each National Football League game.
  • In colonial Boston, schoolteachers earned about seven cents a day.
  • Giraffes can not swim.
  • The real name of television's Mr. Ed was Bamboo Harvester.
  • Jim Hogg, the governor of Texas from 1891 to 1895, named his only daughter Ima Hogg.
  • Actor Stewart Granger was born James Stewart.
  • Cats can't taste sweet things.
  • The Bank of America was originally called The Bank of Italy.
  • Lloyd Copeland is credited with the initial development of the microwave oven. His granddaughter is Linda Ronstadt.
  • An adult's skin weighs approximately six pounds.
  • Only right-handed players can play polo according to the U.S. Polo Association. To date, only 3 players on the world circuit are left-handed.
  • France's King Louis XIV bathed only once a year.
  • Jimi Hendrix was working on the song The Story of Life the night he died.
  • Most surveys say that the least-liked vegetable is the turnip.
  • Most snakes can go without eating for a whole year.
  • Tombstones were first placed on plots over the dead so that the deceased could not come out and harm the living.
  • Hockey is called shinny in Scotland.
  • There are 88 keys on a piano--52 white and 36 black.

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February 15th, 2010 at 10:01 am

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Valentine’s Day

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Beginning in kindergarten, we exchange cards with classmates and friends on
Valentine's Day. Later, it's flowers and presents for loved ones. Here's why we
do it, lifted from the pages of
Uncle John's Bathroom Reader (© 1988).

This "lovers' holiday" is an anomaly. It was actually an effort by the Catholic Church to keep teenagers from becoming lovers.

Before Christ was born, it was a Roman tradition for teenage girls and boys to gather every February in the name of the god Lupercus, and randomly select a "mate" for a year. They were permitted to do anything they liked together (and what else would teenagers do?).

When Christians gained power in the Roman Empire, they wanted to bring this practice to an end. So they selected a substitute for Lupercus (to be the focus of a parallel holiday)--St. Valentine, a bishop that had reputedly been tortured and executed by Emporer Claudius II in 270 A.D., for performing marriages after Claudius had outlawed them in the Empire. This symbol of more "wholesome" love was reluctantly accepted by the Romans. But just to be sure no one gave in to temptation, the Catholic Church made it a mortal sin to worship Lupercus. Eventually, Valentine's Day became a recognized holiday throughout Western Europe.

If teens couldn't get together in February, what could they do? They could send each other respectful notes of affection. And they did, although it seems like a poor substitute. At any rate, sending lover's greetings became a part of the Valentine's day ritual, and when Christian influence grew, the practice of sending notes on February 14 spread with it.

The first greeting cards didn't appear until the 18th century. Printed cards were common in Germany by the 1780's; they were called Freundschaftkarten, or "friendship cards." The first American cards were manufactured in the 1870's, at an amazing cost of up to thirty-five dollars apiece.

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In the spirit of Valentine's Day (sort of), here are a few public marriage proposals gone wrong. Very, very wrong. I think maybe the theme is that these were all on Valentine's Day. Poor guys.


The embedded video isn't reliable. If you can't see the video above, click here.

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Also, Kevin Smith was kicked off the planet a plane for making the worst movies ever being too fat.

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February 14th, 2010 at 10:40 am

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Some Unrelated Thoughts/Links

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My site is getting a lot of Valentine's Day-related hits recently. I'm not complaining. Here are some google searches that have brought people to my site:

  • valentine sippy cups
  • valentine blog
  • valentine widget for wordpress
  • valentine's gift ideas
  • music for valentine's day
  • useless valentine facts
  • valentine font

I have also found out about other people with my name. Other Evan Valentines in this world include:

  • A highschool athlete who plays tennis and football
  • A [female] pornstar (I use the term "star" very loosely lightly here)
  • A standup comedian

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Who would have ever thought that someone crying at the end of a movie could be so funny and adorable? Parker Stech thought so, and he went where no man has gone before. His wife cries at the end of virtually every movie they watch, and he records interviews with her while she's crying and posts it on YouTube. Just go to cryingwife.com and click "videos" to see for yourself. Some of the movies are sad and deserving of crying, but some of them are not in that realm at all, such as Back to the Future. Hilarious.

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I have been discussing with a friend of mine about SEO optimization (at great length). There are different ways to essentially 'game the system' and increase your page rank on google. The fact of the matter is that my URL has no keywords at all and that makes it difficult for me. I have taken some steps towards trying to create backlinks and I have renamed my blog. At first I thought about trying to corner the market on "professional photographers in the DC area," but upon further research it seemed that those were hard keywords to advance my page, so I settled on something to do with "stay at home dads." I renamed my blog "Evan Valentine, The Stay-at-Home Dad" to try to get some more search results. It has worked a few times so far. I am doing research into hosting the same blog via multiple URLs. More on that later.

I have made a few recent posts in a shameless attempt to figure out search engines. First I made my "Kurt Warner Retires" post. I made this post 2 hours before the news was officially announced in an attempt to get a jump on the competition. It did not work. Then I made my "WordPress Plugins Used On This Blog" post in an attempt to get some visits from nerds trying to do research on how to gain an advantage on their blog. That also has proved unfruitful. Running a blog seems like a full time job, and it is a constant learning experience.

The funny thing is that my recent post with pictures of the snow behind my house has gotten way more hits than any of my other posts, because of people searching "snow" and my city.

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Growing up in a place that had no winter weather, there were a few things I had to get used to when I moved here. I had never shoveled snow or owned an ice scraper (a credit card/student ID always worked fine in the unlikely event that there was any ice in the morning). Another thing I didn't expect was that chap stick is a near-must when the weather is cold and dry for a prolonged period. I had never used chap stick, and now I have a near obsession with it four months out of the year. Luckily I have like five sticks in my drawer. Another weird thing that you don't think about: I never needed windshield washer fluid in Georgia. Wiping down your windows every other time you filled gas was quite enough. But when you get hit with splashback from a brown puddle of melted snow mixed with salt and sand, it's over. You absolutely need that instant windshield wash.

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Ever wanted to be an investigative reporter? Let Charlie Brooker show you how.

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A story about Nintendo from 1988. Part of the humor is seeing a very young Bill O'Reilly on Inside Edition from back in the day (back in the WE'LL DO IT LIVE! days). The other part that is interesting is how unbelievable it now seems that adults had never heard of Nintendo--and this is within my lifetime. Asking people if they had ever heard of Nintendo, they respond with "No, who is he?"

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Two songs that make me happy every time I hear them:

  1. Bruddah Iz - Henehene Kou ' Aka
  2. Gui Boratto - Beautiful Life - Great vocals come in just after the three minute mark.

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I have a strange view of myself (don't we all?). Unfortunately, I assume everyone doesn't understand me and automatically thinks I'm an asshole, and that sort of leads me to fulfill that role, even though it is self-imposed. I also assume everyone thinks the music I like/make is weird and I am being judged because of it, when in reality that's not true at all. I usually don't speak much when meeting new people. I never talk about my music with people (if you want to see someone in an extremely uncomfortable state, just play one of my songs in front of me. I can't even begin to describe how horrible it is). Some people immediately think I'm cool because of that (silence is often mistaken for wisdom) and some people immediately think I hate them because of that. I think my friend Adam said it best. Some people are focused on what they think of other people (that's me), and some people are focused on what others think of them. Neither is healthy, though I think someone like me is much less likely to get their feelings hurt.

In the end, I know that what I think doesn't really matter, but I am not good at relating that. I realize that it's just one person's opinion, but I can come across like my opinion is the only one that matters.

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Here is an article about a Japanese DVD that supposedly helps you maintain eye contact when talking to women. It has all different types/ages of women, some with lots of cleavage showing, and you are supposed to maintain eye contact with them for the duration of the video clips. So odd... Japanese people apparently think they can solve all problems, both big and small, with technology.

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Speaking of weird things in Asia, check this out. This fish is called a Human-faced Carp (warning, this video is a bit loud), and now you'll know why. Some of the YouTube comments say this video is a joke/hoax. Real or not, it freaked me out more than I'd like to admit.

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February 13th, 2010 at 8:37 am

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